I Know I Knew You
by 61wisampa
Summary: You just wanted to remember who you are. /Post-canon
1. Hey, Do You Remember?

**Chapter I: Hey, Do You Remember?**

"Hey, Misaka-san, do you remember?" Your friend, Saten Ruiko, asked as she and your two other friends, Shirai Kuroko and Uiharu Kazari, toured you around a particularly plain arcade. "You used to go here a lot. Sometimes the four of us even come together and have competitions on who will have the top score!"

"Really?" you asked, looking around the arcade to try and figure out why you had been so fond of it. It seemed like any other arcade to you.

"That's mostly you and Misaka-san, Saten-san," Uiharu-san said.

"And is it really wise to tour Onee-sama here of all places?" Shirai-sa—no, _Kuroko_ crossed her arms in a displeased manner, "As someone of Onee-sama's stature, we should not encourage her to go back to her old un-ladylike practices. Instead, we should persuade her to try activities that fits an ojou-sama more, like playing koto or doing tea ceremonies—ow!"

You flicked her lightly on the ear when you heard her, "Don't try to reprogram me just because I forgot who I was!"

The arcade, as it turned out, was actually a very entertaining place. You found yourself playing game after game for almost two hours, enjoying every minute of it. And later, you would learn that this particular arcade was also the source of your ammunition for the infamous attack that your so called esper name had come from.

* * *

Your name was Misaka Mikoto. You were a third year in Tokiwadai Middle School where you were known as the Ace. You were a Level 5, one of the seven strongest espers in Academy City. You were an Electromaster. You were the _Railgun._

You remembered memorizing these facts when you woke up one day in the hospital with no memory. At first you had been scared, confused and utterly lost as to why you were there and who you were. The sparks that had suddenly appeared from your fingertips when you started to panic didn't help you any better. You didn't know what was happening with you, and it only freaked you out more. If it hadn't been for the kind frog-faced doctor you wouldn't have calmed down enough to listen to any explanations.

The frog-faced doctor had told you that you had been involved in an accident, the details of which, he had said he didn't know—though you were pretty sure that he at least knew a part of it but chose not to share it with you. This accident had caused you to lose all of your memories, and while recovery was not impossible, the damage that had been done to your brain was no small matter and recalling everything might take months or even years.

He then proceeded to tell you details of your life. The basics, he had said, but in the end you still felt overwhelmed. You lived in a city filled with students that had superpowers and you were one of the strongest. You were ranked Number Three, and apparently you could control electricity.

It wasn't that you had thought he was lying. It was just that the story seemed so ridiculous and yet deep down a part of you so easily accepted it, and that was what bothered you the most. Not that having superpowers didn't seem cool, but those were things you'd find in a manga or a video game. You should not have been able to believe it so quickly. And yet, it had been the only explanation to the electricity that you seemed to be able to produce. You believed it, but it was still hard to get your mind wrapped around it.

You met your parents not long after; a woman named Misaka Misuzu who looked like the older version of you when you looked in the mirror (though you were a little surprised that your mother looked so young), and a man with a grinning face named Misaka Tabigake who had been holding a silly frog stuffed toy when they entered.

You were glomped (smothered) by your mother the moment she saw you, not even giving you the chance to greet them, and immediately, you felt a connection with her and you couldn't help the overwhelming calm and security that came with your mother's embrace and soon you found yourself hugging her as well.

"See, Papa? I told you Mikoto-chan will have no trouble remembering her Mama. She already knows my hug! I knew my motherly instincts were right." Your _'Mama'_ told your _'Papa'_ as she released you from her embrace, grinning all the while.

Your _'Papa'_ chuckled with his deep voice, "I never doubted Mama."

There was a feeling in your chest, like you were so happy that you wanted to cry, and you couldn't stop your lips from twitching up a little from the relief and familiarity your mother gave you.

"Ah, Mikoto-chan, are those tears of joy?" she asked you teasingly when she noticed the droplets gathering around your eyes.

Your first reaction was to wipe them away, even though the tears hadn't fallen. Then you gave her your most nonchalant expression and retorted, "W-what tears? I'm not crying."

For whatever reason, she giggled at this, "That's my Mikoto-chan. You're still a tsundere!"

You instantly felt your cheeks become hot, "W-who's the tsundere?!"

Your mother seemed to love teasing you because she went on saying embarrassing things about yourself that you were only relearning now. By instinct, you tried to deny all of them even though you have no idea if she was telling the truth or not. But even with the relentless teasing, you were glad at how familiar she acted with you even with the knowledge that you didn't even remember her name.

After a while, your father intervened, "Now, now, Mama. I don't think you should rile our Mikoto-chan up too much. She's still recovering."

You were panting a little after the one-sided argument between you and your mother, and you were a little thankful that she did stop, giggling a little as she responded to her husband, "Oh alright. But you just want your turn with Mikoto-chan, don't you?"

He merely grinned and shrugged, "Well, it has been a while since I've been with my little girl. I can't help it if I want to monopolize as much time with her as I can."

"I'll leave the two of you then," she said with a smile, standing up and hugging you one more time, "I'll talk to the doctor for a while, okay, Mikoto-chan?"

You nodded, not knowing how else to respond. "Alright,"

Your _Mama_ left you with your _Papa_ after that, closing the door of your hospital room lightly. You suddenly felt a little nervous, because while it hadn't been too difficult reconnecting with your mother, she had been the one to take the lead. Your father didn't seem as energetic and talkative as her so there was a little fear in your chest that it might be harder to remember him, unlike your mother.

You knew he'd be heart-broken if it happened, and you had this feeling in your stomach that you really didn't want to see him sad.

A silence overcame the two of you as he slowly walked towards your bed. He moved the chair that your mother had used, sitting himself on it before handing the frog stuffed toy to you with a small smile. "I bought this for you."

You looked at the silly toy and felt yourself beam. For some reason, when you looked at the frog character the second time, you realized how adorable it actually was. You gingerly took the toy from his hands, staring at it as you replied a soft, "Thank you."

His mouth widened into a grin, "I knew you would like it. Even as a kid, you've always loved Gekota. I figured I might as well try it."

"So his name is Gekota," you mumbled, unable to keep a bright smile from your face, "It's nice to meet you again, Gekota." you spoke softly to the stuffed toy, hugging it to your chest.

You didn't feel embarrassed with your father watching you as you did. Somehow, it felt natural, like he had always done it when you were a kid. Mildly, you deduced that it was probably the case and instantly felt comforted by the fact that knowing your parents once again hadn't been as difficult as you had feared.

"How are you?" came the soft voice of your father—no, _Papa_. He looked at you with equally gentle eyes. "Are you having trouble with this whole memory thing?"

You dropped your gaze to your lap, tightening your hold on Gekota in your arms to seek comfort, "I'm... not sure how to answer that." You began hesitantly. "You two were the first people I talked to apart from that doctor that looks like Gekota and so far, it hasn't been that bad. But I think it has something to do with the fact that you're family. Everything in my body, except my conscious mind, seem to know you so it's a lot easier to accept who you are."

"How about other things? Your friends? Your school? Has Heaven Canceler told you who you are?"

"He has," you replied, a light frown marring your face as you remembered everything the doctor had said, "I don't think he's lying but... it's just _so hard_ to believe." You pushed Gekota away from your chest and held him at arms length, staring at him as you went on with your thoughts. For a moment, your brow twitched at the realization that you called him a 'he' instead of an 'it'. Maybe Gekota _was_ that special to you. "I can't wrap my head around it. A city full of espers? Me, the third strongest of all the students with superpowers and who can control electricity? It's..."

"Unbelievable?" your _Papa_ finished when you trailed off.

You nodded, "Yes." You affirmed, and then said, "If I hadn't seen my own powers first hand I would've yelled at the doctor for lying to me. And after he told me about it, I also noticed things that I _shouldn't._ For some reason, I know that there are exactly 168 electronic machines on this floor, one of which is the cellphone in your left coat pocket that has about 47% battery left. I know, five meters before they even get close, that someone will pass by. And now, I know that the third elevator broke down and some people are stuck." You shut your eyes, feeling overwhelmed at all the information going through your head but at the same time, feeling that it was just fine, like it was normal to feel all of these. "Are they because of my... _ability_?" You were surprised to realize the word hadn't felt as strange in your tongue as you thought it would, "Is this normal?"

"I'm not sure of the extent of your powers, but you have mentioned to me before that you can use it for spatial sensing," your _Papa_ said, rubbing his chin in thought, "You also told me that you unconsciously receive and process electromagnetic phenomenon, so I think that's the reason. Is it bothering you? Are you uncomfortable with it?"

You shook your head, "No, and _that's_ bothering me. This isn't normal but... I feel like it is." You ran hand down your bangs, the tips of your fingers brushing against the bandage wrapped around your forehead. "My mind keeps contradicting my body and it's confusing. It's as if they're totally out of sync."

He offered a small comforting smile, "Don't worry. You'll get used to it in a while."

You didn't know how else to reply so you merely nodded. While the extra senses did seem odd at first, it made you feel a little more secured. For what reason, you didn't know, but you figured that with time, they would come to you as if they were your normal senses and the knowledge comforted you a little.

But there were still questions that you needed answers to. People have been telling you how you'd eventually recover, that your memory would come back in time, but none have told you how you lost them in the first place. What exactly had happened?

"Hey, uhm... Papa?" you hesitantly said, still trying to get used to calling him that, "Do you..." you trailed off. This time, the unease came from the illogical fear of knowing. Why didn't the doctor tell you in the first place? Were you better off without the knowledge? "Do you know how I became like this?" you finally asked, "Do you know what happened to me? Why I lost my memories?"

Your Papa avoided you gaze, and with just the expression on his face, you knew his answer, "Yes, I do."

You swallowed a nervous lump in your throat. "C-can you tell me about it?"

He was silent for another moment, but then looked at you and said, "I think it's best if you remember it on your own, Mikoto-chan. And Heaven Canceler specifically instructed not to tell you too much information lest it impairs your recovery. I'm sure he's told you, but not only will your past memories take time to come back but you will have some trouble making new ones for a while." He looked so pained as he spoke that you began to wonder even more just what exactly you had gotten yourself into. And why... did it seem like there were some guilt in your Papa's expression? "It will take some time, but you _can_ get all your memories back. You just have to be patient."

You were a little disappointed at his answer, but you knew he only wanted what was best for you. Still, you needed to know something about the accident to ease that worry in your mind."Then..." you began again, just as hesitantly as the first time, "do you at least know why I did it?"

His gaze softened as he said, "You wanted to save the people you love."

Your heart stopped, "Did I do it?" you asked, almost afraid of his answer, "Was I able to save them?"

For some reason, his eyes began to water as he answered, "Yes, Mikoto. You did." You let out the breath you didn't know you were holding and felt the relief wash through. "And I'm very proud of you."

He brought you into a tight embrace, feeling your shoulder dampen as the tears fell onto the fabric of your hospital gown. You tentatively wrapped your arms around him as well both in an attempt to comfort him and because it just felt right to hug your Papa that way. But as you soaked up the warmth from his embrace, he murmured to you almost mournfully.

"I just wish you didn't have to sacrifice so much."

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

I'm alive! yes, it's been a long long _long_ while since I updated anything and I'm sorry! I can't make any promises because shit has been happening in school but I hope you know i'm still continuing my stories! ...if you remember them that is XD

By the way, I blame Cun-sama for this XD I've had this idea ever since I read the last update of the forever incomplete Of Science and Magics (which was like, _years ago_ by the way) but only ever got around to writing it when I read Cun-sama's own memory loss story XD that story will probably never see the light of day but still, it was really good and so this story was written!

If you didn't get it, with how vague i'm probably being, this is my take on a probable ending for To Aru XDDD yeah, sorry. I feel like a lot of people will start sending me hate mails because of how I ended it in this story but can you blame me? I still love Mikoto the most and would like to just see one girl whose life doesn't revolve around Touma... and yeah, Vindex101 and I are probably gonna have another argument once he reads this so i'll try to prepare haha but as for the complete 'how did the final battle go?' I'll probably keep it as vague as I can. I'm not a good enough writer to think of something so complicated XD

Shout out to GreatSnapper too who helped on some proofreading for this XD and to these amazing fellows who I have not talked to in a while, Digeridoodler, RoadMart & TPK.

To those who are wondering, no, this isn't a Kamikoto fic per se, but yes, there will be an eventual Kamikoto. It would just be a really _really **really**_ slow build and also doesn't focus on the whole romance department. He'll appear occasionally but mostly, the chapters will revolve around Mikoto meeting old friends and acquaintances and relearning about herself. it might get pretty angsty at times but i'll try to put funny things occasionally.

this won't be updated regularly. or at least not as much as my previous stories that had to be updated... wow, i just realized how rarely i update XD but yeah i'm just posting this for the sake of posting something. this wasn't supposed to see the light of day yet but i really can't think of what wshould happen in **_Captured Moments_** and _**Struck by lightning**_ so for the mean time, i'm stuck

also exams are on the way again so sorry!

Not much else I can say because I fear I might spoil something XD even though this isn't one of my usual stories, i hope you guys will like it :))

 **Tell me what you thought about it? :3**

 **~61wisampa**


	2. We're Friends But You Don't Remember

**Chapter II: We're Friends But You Don't Remember**

 _There was pain._

 _There was so much pain._

 _But you couldn't do anything but tremble as it took your mind and body, clouding each of your senses and leaving you sobbing silently in a futile attempt to lessen it._

 _You couldn't feel anything else._

 _You couldn't move._

 _That was until you heard a voice, calling a name that you didn't recognize._

 _Then your eyes snapped open._

 _You were assaulted by the sudden functioning of your senses, and all at once, you can feel_ everything _. Pulses, moving objects, beeping, tingling current, the bright light, your ragged breathing, your sweaty forehead, your shivering form and pain—_ pain _that seemed to be all over and nowhere at all. It was confusing. It was_ maddening.

 _Then, a dark blob hovered over you, blocking the blinding light that was hitting your eyes. He mumbled the name that you didn't know but recognized as the same one that woke you up, but you couldn't see him exactly. If he was even an actual 'he' was a subconscious decision, but his face was blurred beyond your recognition and apart from that unknown yet familiar name, the rest of his words were drowned by the ringing inside your ears, making you deaf from everything else._

 _You struggled to mutter a simple reply but only managed to stutter out, "W-who...?" before the pain won and your consciousness left you._

–

Going back to Misaka Mikoto's life—your old life—was easier than you initially thought. It had a lot to do with your friends—or, Misaka Mikoto's friends—helping you out however they could, and your ever supportive parents taking care of everything school related.

Shirai Kuroko, Uiharu Kazari and Saten Ruiko were the names of the girls who visited you not long after your first meeting with your parents. They had all been sad when they found out what happened to you, tearing up as they asked you to stop joking around and just let them hug you already. You told them that you were serious, feeling your chest become heavier as the three of them began to cry. Uiharu-san in particular bawled out the most, but even as Saten-san tried to comfort her, and Shirai-san kept quiet to hide her own tears, you knew how hurt they were for losing their friend and it made you wonder who Misaka Mikoto was that these girls cried for her loss.

After a few minutes of tears, Saten-san immediately brightened up, even with her eyes still puffy, and announced, "Why are we even crying? Misaka-san may have lost her memories but she's still here! So what if she doesn't remember us? We can help her get her memories back! And even if she can't, we'll just make new memories with her!"

Saten-san's impromptu speech seemed to have brought the other two's spirits higher as Uiharu-san nodded determinedly with a sniff, smiling in agreement, "That's right! Misaka-san is Misaka-san, with or without memories!"

Shirai-san, being the most subdued, merely wiped the tears from her eyes delicately and smiled, "You two are correct. We should be grateful Onee-sama is still with us after everything that has happened. Is that right?"

"You guys..." you mumbled in surprise. You were so glad about everything they had said but you couldn't put them into words.

"Let's all start over then. Misaka-san," Saten-san said, looking at you with a grin, "My name's Saten Ruiko. I'm a second year in Sakugawa Middle School. I'm a Level 0 but you never cared about that, and you might not remember but we're friends! It's nice to meet you again, Misaka-san!"

Uiharu-san came next, linking her hands in front of her lap, "M-my name is Uiharu Kazari, second year in Sakugawa Middle School. I'm a member of Judgment so if you ever get in trouble, don't hesitate to ask. I-it's nice to meet you again, Misaka-san!"

"Of course, the best is saved for last." Lastly, Shirai-san spoke, flipping her hair as she began, "I am Shirai Kuroko, a second year in Tokiwadai Middle School! I am also a Judgment member and Onee-sama's one and only partner! Her roommate and herald, and the only person whom Onee-sama allows on her bed andwWOOUUCCHH!"

You blinked in surprise when Uiharu-san suddenly pulled Shira-san's cheek, causing the girl to complain in unintelligible words. "Please ignore the last part, Misaka-san. We don't want Shirai-san taking advantage of you while you're like this." Uiharu-san said with a huge smile on her face.

"Wuwihwawuuu! Wewppwo!" Shirai-san's complaints came out as gibberish as Uiharu-san pulled on her cheeks harder.

You couldn't help it. You laughed for the first time since you could remember—which admittedly wasn't too long—and just continued to do so until your stomach began to hurt and there were tears around your eyes.

At first, the three girls looked at you weirdly, but soon they joined in. And even though there were still countless things you were unsure of, you were glad to know that Misaka Mikoto— _you—_ had friends like them.

–

It was in the middle of Saten-san chatting away about the latest Urban Legend when you felt it, making you turn your head towards the door, expecting something—or some _one_ to come in because suddenly, the door wasn't there anymore even though you could _see_ it and it pretty much didn't move even just by an inch.

As quickly as it had come (or disappeared?), it was gone (or reappeared?). Your obvious distraction did not go unnoticed by your newly reacquainted friends, and they all turned to the direction you had looked as Shirai-san asked you what was wrong.

"I thought there was something..." you trailed off, shaking your head as you tried to explain it more, "No, more like, the door _didn't_ feel like anything for a moment—like it... _disappeared_ from my radar or something." You mumbled distractedly, and when you realized how odd your words had been, you immediately tried to correct yourself. "W-well, not _radar_ but I seem to have this spatial sensing ability and for a moment it felt like something blocked the door and I'm probably spouting out nonsense now so—"

"Onee-sama," Shirai-san, who still hadn't explained to you why she called you that, halted your rambling and said, "We know your ability has that consequence. We all understood what you said."

Saten-san piped up, "Well, not _all_ of it but—"

The longer haired girl was silenced by the twin-tailed girl's glare. "As I was saying, we knew of your spatial sensing. So what was it that caught your attention?"

You felt yourself frown a little more, glancing back at the obviously present door. "I couldn't feel it." You began, staring it. "It was like I felt the door disappear for just a second, but when I looked, it hasn't even moved. I thought someone was coming in, but then again, I should have been able to tell if there was anyone coming in. But that time it just felt like a... a _void._ I couldn't even tell what it was."

Saten-san and Uiharu-san looked questioningly at each other while Shirai-san frowned in thought. After another moment, the three of them exchanged meaningful glances, and you instantly felt like there was something they didn't want to tell you. You waited for a response from them but all you got was Shirai-san saying dismissively, "It must've been nothing, Onee-sama. Maybe your concentration just lapsed for a moment?"

You nodded, but deep down you knew that wasn't it. Whatever this _spatial sense_ was, you knew it was subconscious. It was like breathing to you and the fact that you felt it falter for a moment was like taking the air from your lungs for a split second. It was disconcerting, but maybe you were thinking too much of it. You were sure your friends wouldn't keep anything from you if it mattered. Maybe it was one of those things that Heaven Canceler had said to be better for you to remember yourself.

You didn't pursue the topic and the four of you slid back into that easy conversation. But later that night, as you laid on your hospital bed in an attempt to sleep, you couldn't ignore the nagging feeling at the back of your mind that it was important—that whoever it was that you hadn't sensed in the doorway was someone you needed to meet.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

Okay, first of all, holy shit, I just finished watching the **_Kyoukai no Kanata Movie: I'll Be Here_** and _holy shit_ it was **really good** and there were tears T-T if you haven't watched it, i really think that you should! But what really got me was that similarities between that movie and this fanfic XDD it won't be exactly like that, obviously, but really. the general concept was there hahaha

ANYWAYS

Yes, the beginning was a kind of flashback thingy that will be explained maybe... further into the story XD and well... Mikoto's ability is a little complicated (despite my somehow average knowledge about electromagnetics) so bear with me if I can't explain things well or just plain get certain things wrong XD I swear i didn't mean to.

 _"Misaka-san is Misaka-san. Mio-chan is Mio-chan. And Ricchan is Ricchan!"_ Yes! I made a VA joke hahaha so sue me if it's corny or not even funny like at all... but yeah, if no one noticed, that was a joke.

Also, I'm hoping you all could follow the messy timeline that this story is showing. It won't jump around a lot anymore (I hope) but if it does, it would probably just be the backstory. The frontstory should be very linear. And as I said before, this won't focus on any particular character except Mikoto and her journey to regain her memories XD so maybe in the future chapters, people you might not expect will appear! yaaay!

I'm sure you have theories about _certain things_ in this chapter and if you do somehow get it right, i think it will be best to tell everyone that "I will neither confirm nor deny any of your claims." haha i don't think the secrets would be secrets for long though soooo :D

I'm glad you read this! Again, this is a very slow build story, Kamikoto or not, so i hope you can be patient... with the story and me because i update so scarcely XDD Thank you for putting up with me!

By the way, it's hard to notice right now but each chapter title is actually kind of like the POV of whomever it is that Mikoto would be talking or reconnecting with in the chapter. So I propose we start a kind of game XD at the end of every chapter in my Author's Notes, I'm gonna reveal the title for the next chapter (if there is already a next chapter planned XD) and you guys can guess who the next person would be :))) just to make this interesting haha

 **so did you like the chapter?** The first chapter was mostly focused on family and now it's friendship! I sincerely hope I made you smile at the scenes where I attempted to be funny XD keeping this whole thing light hearted! haha **Leave a Review so you can tell me about it! :))**

 **Chapter III: We're Not Friends But You Saved Me**

 **I'll see you guys again soon~**

 **~61wisampa**


	3. We're Not Friends But You Saved Me

**Chapter III: We're Not Friends But You Saved Me**

 _There were seven of you in the midst of the chaos._

 _Four were boys and three of you were girls. There were explosions and fire and scrap metal everywhere, and it took everything in you not to collapse from exhaustion. Instead, you trudged on, sending a magnetized metal piece against the numerous robot things that you were fighting. It looked like your group had defeated over a thousand of those, but there were thousands more to come._

 _"_ _There's no end to them!" you shouted, sending another robot flying. You panted but you didn't relent, taking a coin out from your pocket and flicking it, shooting it towards four robots that had aligned from your vantage point. A couple more exploded when hundreds of beams of light pierced the air, and you immediately took off at a run—with the help of magnetism to propel you forward—lest you got caught in the massive explosion._

 _One of the guys laughed, the kind that sounded like he was enjoying watching some kind of sport and was utterly pumped up. "Now that's what I call GUTS! I need to try harder too or else I'll be out-GUT-ted!"_

 _Another one replied, "That's the most idiotic thing I've heard all day!"_

 _Another retorted, "Like you're one to talk, sixth rate."_

 _The girl who had shot out the deadly beams of light rebutted, "The fuck is with you and calling each of us by rank?"_

 _The last guy responded, "It must be a habit of his to show his rank off so that no one would try to fight him. We all know Number 1 is a softie."_

 _"_ _Oh, fuck all of you!"_

 _You would've laughed at the scene, because never in a million years would you have predicted this to ever happen—the seven Level 5s together in the same place and actually having an arguably friendly conversation—but since everything was literally blowing up, you chose to be the sensible one of the group and shouted, "Hey! You can go at each other's throats once we finish this! Now where the hell is Shokuhou and what's taking her so long?!"_

 _All of a sudden, the robots you had been fighting stopped and fell onto the floor in a useless heap. You heard the distinct sound of a microphone being turned on before you heard a panting voice through the speakers, "How rude, Misaka-san. Do you... do you know how many flights of stairs I had to run up to get here?!"_

 _You collapsed on your butt, finally relaxing when you heard the voice. You saw the others do the same thing, and you grinned. "I'm guessing three flights of stairs. That's not nearly enough to exhaust anyone."_

 _"_ _It was three and a half! And the hallways are long too!"_

 _"_ _You're just out of shape. Admit it!"_

 _"_ _Mou!"_

 _You almost laughed at the whiny sound she made but you were too tired. Instead, a big grin settled on your face as you tried to regain your strength. This was only the main security. You still needed to go after that idiot who was going to confront the evil boss._

 _But before you could do anything, red lights suddenly flashed, and the girl behind the microphone stated in alarm, "The system was overridden! They're sending something to fight you. I can't stop it!"_

 _As if on cue, the doors, that you had thought to be plain walls at the beginning, opened, releasing around fifty cyborgs._

 _You knew what they were and immediately felt dread. And for the first time in your life (and also probably due to being exposed to this little group of crazy espers), you cursed._

 _"_ _Oh shit."_

–

You've learned everything you could about Misaka Mikoto (yourself) from her (your) friends, but apparently, Misaka Mikoto ( _former_ you) kept a lot of things from them. For what reasons, you guessed they had to have been good enough because you thought (hoped) you were a good enough friend to them.

The loss of your memories was decided to be kept a secret between your most trusted friends and family. As it was, only your parents and your three closest friends knew about it. You still didn't understand why but everyone seemed to agree that it would be better that the knowledge was not made public.

You've met your other friends from Tokiwadai Middle School like Kongou-san, Wannai-san and Awatsuki-san, those from Sakugawa Middle School like Edasaki-san and Haruue-san, and even Shirai-san and Uiharu-san's senpai from Judgment, Konori-san. You guessed that you met all of them through your three friends so you were quite confused when an older girl with long brown hair wearing a frown slammed your door open one afternoon.

With her was a blonde guy that looked around her age and two girls, one that seemed as old as the first two with short black hair and one that seemed closer to your age with brown hair that was a little shorter than yours. A little girl with long blonde hair was also with them, and she instantly bounded up onto the foot of your bed, smiling brightly.

"Are you okay now, Onee-chan?" the little girl asked, her phone with a white beetle keychain on hand, "Mugino said you got hurt and we wanted to visit you. Essentially, Hamazura didn't let us until today! He said you were so tired that you've been sleeping for several days. But essentially, he's lying, right? I can never sleep that long!"

You were a bit too overwhelmed by the little girl's sudden questions that you couldn't utter an immediate reply. Thankfully, the blonde male interjected, saving you from answering. "Slow down, Fremea. According to the doctor, Misaka-san just woke up. Don't overwhelm her with so many questions."

The girl with black hair stepped in front of the blonde guy, an apathetic look on her face, and bowed to you in greeting, "We're glad you're alright now." She said with an equally apathetic voice.

You blinked, unsure of what else to say but stutter a soft, "T-thanks..."

"So I hear you got super messed up during the big fight." The shorter girl with a short brown bob of a hair piped up. She crossed her arms as she continued. "You did super great though. Even Mugino here admits that you did good, even though she's super unhappy about it."

The girl who had slammed your door glared at the shorter one, growling, "When did I say that, huh, Kinuhata?"

The blonde guy spoke next, "I thought you two were friends now, Mugino."

"When the fuck did I ever say that, _huh_?!"

Somehow, the four older people got into an argument that you were not able to follow. You could almost feel a sweat drop on your forehead at the utter ridiculousness of the conversation. In the midst of this, The little girl—Fremea, you recalled—spoke to you once again. "So can you go watch movies with us again?" The girl asked with a hopeful smile. "Essentially, we miss you!"

You tilted your head to the side in confusion, "'We'?"

She nodded her head. "That little kid Last Order and Kreutune, of course! There's this movie this weekend. Essentially, we wanted to watch it together!"

You tried to hide your confusion when you didn't recognize the names. 'Last Order'? The didn't sound like a name to you. And Kreutune? It sounded German. Though, that thought immediately made you wonder how you even knew that it sounded German. Did you like to watch German movies?

You shook your head a little at the ridiculous path your thoughts had gone into. At this, Fremea visibly saddened, and you realized that she must've thought that it was your answer. Not that you would say yes anyway, but you at least wanted to explain to her first why you couldn't.

"I'm sorry, Fremea, but the doctors told me I have to stay here for at least another week." The sad pout on her lips tugged at your heartstrings, and you couldn't help but put a reassuring hand on the top of her head in an attempt to comfort her. "Tell you what. I can't go this weekend but if the movie is still showing next weekend, I'll take you guys there. Popcorn and drinks will be on me."

Her face immediately brightened. "Really?"

You couldn't help but smile in return. "Really."

"You're really spoiling her, Misaka-san," the blonde boy chuckled. Apparently, their argument earlier had been settled while you and Fremea talked. "I didn't really believe it when Kamijou-san told me, but you really are a doting Onee-sama."

You blinked. "Kamijou-san?"

The girl with the long hair—Mugino, you thought—suddenly sent an elbow to his stomach, making him sputter for breath. She glared at him while the others didn't even seem to care that he was in pain. You frowned at this, feeling the tension build quickly.

Before the blonde guy could even recover, Mugino spoke. "Go." She said, jerking her head towards the door. "I need to talk to her in private."

The rest shared glances before dutifully exiting the room, all the while the blonde guy was rubbing his tummy. Even Fremea hopped off your bed to follow them, only to be stopped by Mugino when she asked for the little girl's white beetle keychain.

Once you two were alone, you waited for her to speak first. You weren't really sure who she was and she didn't seem to know that you'd lost your memories. Or maybe it was the others that didn't know and she merely kept it to herself. If that was the case, you felt even more nervous about this girl who had not stopped looking at you so intensely since the others left. You fiddled with your thumbs a little, averting your eyes to your lap in futile attempt to hide your unease.

But you didn't expect a third voice to suddenly ask. "Are you alright now, Misaka-san?"

Your head snapped up, looking around for the source of the voice. "Who...?" you mumbled in confusion. You had not felt anyone enter your room, much less see them in it. There were still only you and Mugino inside.

"Damn it." The other girl cursed. "With that reaction of yours my bet is that the doctor wasn't lying. You really did lose _all_ your memories, didn't you?"

You frowned at her words. Somehow, this girl made it seem like an accusation, that you had made a huge mistake of letting yourself lose your memories. "What's it to you? Who are you anyway?"

She raised an eyebrow at your tone but didn't comment further on it. "I suppose you know who you are, right? That frog-faced doctor had told you that at least."

"Yes. Misaka Mikoto. Electromaster. Level 5. Supposed Number 3. Ace of Tokiwadai. Anything else I need to add to my list?" You said irritably. There was something about her that seemed to give you a bad vibe. Not just the fact that there was this constant _beeping_ coming from her that you had tried to ignore since she came in, nor was it the fact that she was essentially _part robot_ which fascinated you a little (though you'd never admit), but her mere presence set you on edge and you couldn't fathom why.

She snorted, tossing her hair to the side. "Did you lose that brain of yours too? Guess, Railgun. You're Number 3. None of your family and friends have mentioned me, and yet here I am talking to you. And I also know about your fucked up memories even though that knowledge was supposedly kept shut in a tight lid."

You stared at her, piecing together her words. Your eyes widened as you came to the realization. "You're... a Level 5?"

"The _Number 4_ , Railgun. Mugino Shizuri, the Meltdowner." She told you, and you just sat there frozen. But then she added, "Huh. This is the first time I actually had to introduce myself."

You were still a little too shocked. The whole _Seven Level 5s_ had already been a strange and almost magical concept to you, as if they were just myths and made up stories about fictional people. The fact that you were one was already hard to believe but realizing that another one was standing right in front of you made everything _very real_.

"N-number 4..." you mumbled in slight disbelief. You've heard how powerful Level 5s were but had thought that they were merely exaggerating. You, capable of facing an entire army by yourself? This girl, while only a little older than you were, had enough power to single-handedly destroy a whole city?

You settled on a single thought: _Just how powerful are the seven Level 5s if they worked together?_

 _Flashes of a battle came to your mind. Seven kids fighting an entire army of cyborgs. They were strong individually but together, they were unstoppable._

"Sorry," you let out a breath, putting a hand to your bandage covered forehead. You closed your eyes at the sudden assault of the vision (or was it memory? You didn't know). You rubbed your temples and willed the slight pain away, trying to focus back onto the subject at hand. "So you're a Level 5." You stated again, hoping that speaking it out loud would make it more believable to your mind. You had so many questions, but the first thing you asked was, "How come my friends never mentioned you when you know my condition? Were we...?"

"Friends?" She interjected with a snort. "Hell no. We worked together is all."

"Acquaintances would be the better term, yes." The male voice that you had almost forgotten about once again spoke, and again, you looked around for the speaker.

Mugino noticed what you were doing and sighed. "He's right here." She said, pointing at the white beetle keychain that you only noticed to be on the foot of your bed, right in front of her.

You frowned. "I don't understand. What do you—"

"I'm Kakine Teitoku. Number 2, if you will." The beetle's wings moved and from it, the voice came.

You recoiled in shock. "W-what the hell? Did that thing just—"

To your greater surprise, the beetle began to deform and then reform into a humanoid shape, this time into a boy that looked no older than Mugino. He was pure white, just like how the beetle was, and there was a smile on his face.

"It's nice to meet you again, Misaka-san, though I wish it was under better circumstances." The beetle—boy—no, Kakine—Number 2 said.

You just stared at them wide-eyes for a good ten seconds before saying, "Okay, this is too much. Just... give me a few moments to take this all in."

Mugino groaned loudly. "We didn't come here for that."

You glared at her for her very inconsiderate reaction. "Fine. Then what _did_ you come here for? I find it hard to believe that you went all this way just to wish me well."

"We're indebted to you." Kakine replied.

Your brow rose at this. "What?"

"Look," Mugino said, "I hate to admit it but you saved our asses back there. You saved pretty much everyone in this city. We came here to say that even though we hate each other's guts, you can ask for our help if you ever need it again."

You thought about her words, curious now more than ever about what had happened that led you all to this. Hesitantly, you began, "I don't know what you're talking about but... can you tell me something?"

"If you're going to ask about what happened _that day_ , then you'll be disappointed." Mugino shot you down before you could even ask. "That frog-faced doctor was very firm on letting you recover that part of your memory at your own time."

You felt irritation bubbling up inside you. "What's so different about that part of my memory? Why is it that you can tell me all these ridiculous stuff about espers and Level 5s but you can't tell me how I lost my memories? What's the deal?"

"It's for your well-being, Misaka-san." Kakine told you, "And it's not just a precaution for recovering your memories. It's to protect you as well."

"From what?" you demanded. You were becoming a little frustrated because, while people were allowed to tell you about yourself, the events that led to your memory loss was apparently forbidden. And while you were glad that you were relearning who you were, it didn't help much to lack understanding on how you became like this in the first place. And now, you apparently needed protection? "Is that the reason why my memory loss is being kept a secret?"

"You've made enemies." Kakine replied solemnly, "We're just trying to protect you from them while you don't know who you shouldn't trust."

"And I should trust you?" you retorted. You were tired of their vagueness. And you didn't want any protection from anyone. You just wanted to know who you were. "You haven't even done anything that gives me a reason to."

"You don't have to, brat, because we'll be keeping an eye on you anyway." Mugino snapped back in an irritated voice. You were starting to see why you two weren't friends. You two would sooner kill each other than have a peaceful conversation for long. "We're just telling you so you won't freak out if something happens. Less pain in our asses."

Your immediate response was to give her a deadpanned glare and say, "Gee, thanks," as dryly as you could.

Kakine offered a smile before turning back into a beetle—and scaring the living lights out of you _again—_ and saying, "Then we'll be going. I hope you get well soon."

Mugino merely offered a curt nod before she turned her back on you and began walking towards the door with Beetle Kakine flying beside her.

But then, out of the blue, you remembered something—an off-handed comment that shouldn't have meant much to you but for some reason, it felt like it did more than anything—that the blonde guy earlier had said.

"Wait." You called to the two Level 5s, and they stopped to look at you. Hesitantly, you asked, "Who's Kamijou-san?"

The two shared a look and despite one of them being a beetle, the action resembled the way your friends had glanced at each other the day before when your attention had been taken by the disappearing door in your senses. Something began to sit on your stomach, a feeling that the person you were asking about and the incident with your friends were related.

After a moment, Mugino looked back at you and replied dismissively, "It's no one you should worry about."

You were getting tired of the secrets, but you knew they wouldn't say anything. So instead, you swallowed your questions and nodded, looking at your hands on your lap as you said a hollow, "Okay."

They left without another word.

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

I really hope you at least have a vague idea of who had been talking in the flashback because it's been so long since I wrote this chapter that I forgot XD I think i pinned the dialogues down correctly though, after reading it three times that is XD Also, I'm terrible at explaining appearances. I'm really sorry about that. The POV kinda kicked me in the butt with this one since Mikoto didn't know any of them hahaha it's hard not to use their names so next chapter was easier... i think?

this chapter is a few hundred words longer than the last one... well, don't expect this to be a trend. I think the next chapter is a little shorter? i'll have to do a word count. But yeah, some chapters would be short and some would be extremely long XD

By the way, because of Digimon Tri. I got back into my original fandom **Digimon Frontier**. I think I got way too hyped for Tri. it was meh for me but if you've watched it, what was your reaction? I was just glad Koushiro and Mimi seems to be the ship XDDD Koumi ftw! And someone help me get Vindex101 to finish his fic. He's been neglecting it and i wanted to see some Mikoto and Othinus interaction. They would be hilarious XD

and no one guessed this chapter right D: well, it was very vague. I wouldn't know it would be Mugino and Kakine either XD and if anyone ever gets the character right, i think it would be fair to send that person a snippet of the next chapter, yeah? a little reward for participating in my silly game i guess X3

 **Next Chapter: IV. Sit with Me for a Moment**

You have an idea who the next character would be? **Send me a review or just your thoughts. I'd be happy to have feedback :D**

And if you liked this story, you can share it to your friends or if you didn't share it to your enemies! as a means of torture that is XD

 **Thank you for reading, and I'll see you next time! :D**

 **~~61wisampa**


	4. Sit With Me for a Moment

**Chapter IV: Sit with Me for a Moment**

You stared at the patch of skin just above your right temple where a scar should've remained. The bandages that had covered your forehead for the past week that you had been awake had been removed, and when you looked into the bathroom mirror to see the healed wound, you were surprised to see only smooth unblemished skin.

You had to admit, you were impressed. Academy City did live up to its reputation of being the most technologically advanced city in the world. In a way, you should've been more interested about it, but for some reason, you weren't really as surprised as you thought you should have been. You had found out that you had been injured enough that it would've taken you months to recover had you been sent to a hospital outside Academy City, but now, a mere three weeks later, you were already healed enough to be released.

You sighed, staring at your reflection. You looked more or less how you used to before you got into that mysterious accident that made you lose your memories. Your friends had given you a picture of when the four of you had hung out at the arcade. You didn't know where this arcade was but Saten-san had promised to bring you there once you've settled back into your dorm. There was only a few weeks before the start of the new school year after all.

You felt a little nervous. You wanted to get back to your normal life, copying your hairstyle from the picture your friends had given you and hoping it would make the transition a little bit easier. But it was still hard. It felt as if you were trying to squeeze yourself into a life that didn't belong to you.

It felt a lot like you were trying to replace the Misaka Mikoto who had died when you lost your memories.

You shook your head to rid of the grim thoughts. It wasn't as if you'd never get your memories back. Heaven Canceler had assured you that you will recover them in time. For some reason though, you felt something grip your chest as you thought about your lost memories, a slight fear that you might never truly be back as the Misaka Mikoto that everyone had loved.

You felt like a different person, like Misaka Mikoto was some other person entirely. Deep down, you felt a little connection with her friends and family but there was still a tugging feeling that they were strangers. And to you, they all were, and even after helping you as much as they could and treating you in the most normal way they could, they still were.

You sighed again, looking down at the sink and leaning your hands against it. You were probably thinking too much again. Recovering your memories should be your top priority, not this nonsensical identity crisis that would undoubtedly be solved once you've accomplished remembering.

You felt someone approach your room and heard the door open. Your _extra senses_ had become less distracting as you got used to them. At first, it was a little overwhelming, and you could barely relax because of the heightened senses. After a while though, you noticed them less and less, and it had become as subconscious as breathing. You still tend to stray back into it though but it was no longer uncomfortable.

You closed your eyes, feeling someone walk around your hospital room. You remained on your spot until the person called out. "Mikoto-chan, are you in the bathroom?" Your mother asked from the other side of the bathroom door, knocking on it as she did.

"Yeah," you called back, "Just a moment." You opened the tap on the sink and put your hands under the running cold water, letting it calm you. After a few seconds, you twisted it off and dried your hands on a nearby towel before leaving the bathroom.

Your Mama was sitting on the chair beside your bed when you saw her, and she simply sent you a smile. She was holding a paper bag when she stood up, saying brightly, "Ah, Mikoto-chan, I have something for you!"

You approached the bed and sat in front of her. "What is it?" you asked as she gleefully opened the paper bag.

"Tada!" she exclaimed, showing you a uniform that you distinctly remember Shirai-san wearing. You blinked, unsure of how you should react. "It's your school uniform!" she elaborated when you didn't seem to catch on.

"Ah." You said, unsure of how you should react. In a sense, you knew you should've felt something—nervous, perhaps? Or maybe a little excited—but at that moment, no enthusiasm came to you.

"What do you mean 'Ah'? You can't say just 'Ah'!" Your mama pouted, crossing her arms but not letting go of the uniform. "Aren't you excited? You're going back to school!"

You tried to feel a bit more eager, you really did, but there really wasn't anything that came to you when you heard about school. You scratched the side of your cheek with a finger, saying somewhat nervously, "Uhm... I guess so?"

She sighed, putting back the uniform inside the paper bag. "I guess school is just that boring, huh? And I was hoping Mikoto-chan would at least remember something if I showed it to you."

You shrugged, offering your mama the courtesy of at least an apologetic smile. "Sorry." You told her, honestly appreciating her action. In the back of your mind, you wondered whether your mama was right about school—that it was too boring to remember anything about it. But a part of you also considered that maybe you didn't want to know the things you did in school.

The two Level 5s' visit to you a few days ago had made you think hard about your previous self. From what you had gathered, there seemed to be a lot of things that you had chosen to hide from your friends and family. You hoped they weren't too serious, because from everything that had been happening since you awakened, you were coming close to being overwhelmed. But a part of you knew that if these _things_ really weren't serious then you wouldn't have hidden them from everyone in the first place.

You kind of wanted to hit yourself in the head for being so stupid and keeping everyone you trusted in the dark like that—given, it was your pre-memory loss self, but you nonetheless—but you had easily deduced that giving yourself another amnesia won't really solve any of the possible messes that your previous self had probably made.

"Is there something wrong, Mikoto-chan?" Your Mama asked, bringing you out of your thoughts.

You blinked, realizing that you had probably been staring off to space for some time now. You shook your head, smiling to reassure her. "It's nothing. Just wondering how school was like."

"Well, you never really told me much details about it, so you're going to have to wait a little." She said, setting the paper bag beside you on the bed. "When I checked on Tokiwadai, they said the new semester will start in two weeks. I've already enrolled you, but they said they wanted to talk to you first before you go back."

Your brow rose, "Talk to me about what?"

She shrugged, "Who knows? It's probably about your memory problem. I think they're worried because you're their poster girl."

You hummed, not knowing what else to say. Sometimes, you still felt a little overwhelmed at how important Misaka Mikoto— _you_ were. It was like there was a gaping hole that your previous self used to fill, but now, you could barely even patch it up. You wondered how past-you were able to be so many things to so many people.

"Tomorrow, we'll be going back to your dorm," your Mama spoke again, "We'll check in with your Dorm Mistress, okay? She'll help us get you settled in."

That was right. You lived in a dorm. You were a little scared of the prospect of being away from your parents in your condition, but Shirai-san was your roommate, so you guessed it could be worse.

You stopped yourself from saying your concerns, and meekly replied. "Okay."

–

Intimidating was the first word that came to you that described your Dorm Mistress.

She was stern and strict-looking with her hard gaze and straight posture. Add the office clothes and the pointy glasses to the mix, and you have yourself a scary Dorm Mistress. You could almost swear that she had been a navy seal or something before she retired from that job and took up managing middle school girls' dormitories, if her terrifying aura could say anything about her.

Your Mama had left you with her after dropping you off, promising you that she'd have lunch with you later and invite your friends to come as well. The Dorm Mistress then led you to what you presumed to be her office. You sat on the simple comfy sofa in the middle of the room, tugging at your uniform as you waited. Apparently, Tokiwadai required its students to wear uniform even outside the school—something about school pride and whatnot. You thought it was more of forcing its students to behave though, rather than school pride. What better way to make sure their students are law abiding citizens than blatantly showing the students how easy it would be to track and punish them if they ever do something un-ojou-sama-ish.

Your brows scrunched up a little. That was another thing that you were really uncomfortable about. Since when were you an ojou-sama?

"Here." You were snapped out of your thoughts when the Dorm Mistress suddenly offered you a cup of tea. You mumbled a soft 'thank you' and took it, holding it in what you thought was the proper way. She sat down on the seat in front of you, sipping at her own cup.

You fidgeted as you waited for her to talk. You weren't going to lie; this woman made you nervous for some reason. While it wasn't the threatening kind (or you hoped it wasn't), it was still very intimidating. You tried sneaking glances at her, only to find that she had been staring at you intently, and it only made your unease grow.

Gathering up what little courage you have, you spoke. "Uhm... so—"

"How are you, Misaka?" she asked, her voice much gentler than it had been earlier when she had spoken before.

You were a little surprised at the change, but you answered anyway as you looked away. So many people had asked you that question that you were getting really tired of it. "I'm fine." came your automatic reply.

"You're not a very good liar, Misaka. And just so you know, I've always been able to tell whenever you're not telling the truth." She said, giving you a look. "How are you really?"

You frowned a little. What were you supposed to say? How _were_ you? You knew almost nothing about yourself. Heck, your Wikipedia page may know you more than you knew yourself, if it existed that was. How could you answer something about yourself when you had no idea who you were?

"I don't know." You ended up answering. "I lost my memories, and even though everyone has been trying to help me recover them, telling me things about myself, I still feel like I don't know who I am."

You closed your eyes and gripped your cup a little tighter. You recalled the past few days, meeting people while they told you about how you were before. You appreciated that they go through all those effort, but sometimes, it wasn't enough. Sometimes, it felt like you were listening to a story about someone else and you were merely an onlooker.

"Misaka Mikoto." You said out loud. The name had felt more natural the more you said it, but there was still a feeling of unfamiliarity whenever you try to associate yourself with the name. "That was the first name I learned when I woke up. People say I'm Misaka Mikoto, but sometimes, to me it feels like she's a character from a book. She's smart. She's strong. She's nice. She inspires people, and she's a selfless person who wouldn't bat her eye at the face of danger if it meant helping someone. She's this... great heroine character, and I feel like I'm just reading the book, imagining I'm her."

She studied you for another moment, before asking, "Is that why you're so stiff? You're afraid you'll do something _Misaka Mikoto_ won't?"

You flinched at her observation, mentally deciding that she wasn't a navy seal but a spy or some kind of interrogator if she was able to read you so easily in the span of mere minutes since meeting you. You looked away, not knowing how to reply.

She sighed at this. "I can't say I understand because I don't. I won't pretend to know how to help you either. All I can say is this: you and the old Misaka Mikoto may not have the same mind, not yet, but you will always have the same heart. It may not feel like it, but you're already acting like yourself. You're still you. Even if you don't realize this, everyone else does. So just cut yourself some slack and try not to overthink too much."

You stared at her for a moment, mulling over what she said. But then you let out a breath of laughter before giving her a wry smile. "The heart is just a muscle that pumps blood though. Even if I get a heart transplant right now, it won't really change who I am."

She offered a small smirk in return. "See? Now that's the Misaka Mikoto that I know."

–

 _A girl sat with a boy on the bench, each holding a can of juice. For a long moment neither spoke. No one knew what to say._

 _"_ _So why didn't you ever tell anybody?" She asked softly. She turned her head towards him but he kept his gaze forward. "Your friends, your family... don't you think they deserve to know?"_

 _He gave a sad smile. "I know they do." He said. He rubbed his thumb along the side of the can, wiping the moisture that had condensed upon contact with the cold drink. "I'd just rather they don't get hurt."_

 _"_ _But how can you stand it? You might not say it out loud but I know you still think you're just living the life of 'the original Kamijou Touma'."_

 _"_ _Which is why I'm doing my best to protect everyone's smile. I may not know who I was, but I know Kamijou Touma would've done everything to protect those he loved."_

 _"_ _And you?"_

 _He smiled a little. "I may be filling in his role, but I've come to love those people too. That's why I never told anyone. I don't want the people Kamijou Touma and I love to be hurt unnecessarily. I want to protect them, even from something like this."_

 _"_ _But then, who's gonna protect you?" She asked. "I may not understand what you're going through, but don't you think it'll be easier when you have someone to be there for you? For the people you love to support you?"_

 _He turned to her, giving her that whole-hearted smile that always seemed to make her heart melt. "Don't you already?"_

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

Yay for **Dorm Mistress**! XD people mostly thought it would be Misaki and hey, I don't blame you! I would've thought it was her too XD So does this count as Touma's first appearance? XD even though it's in a flashback hahaha

I realize this story is going pretty slowly but that's how i plan it to be. I don't wanna rush the development and stuff but this won't be as slow burn as that 80 chapter masterpiece I read in another fandom. it took 10 chapters for them to have a civil conversation and 43 chapter for them to get together XDD no worries. I'm not good enough of a writer to write a story that long hahaha

anyway, i'm posting this to say that there's a distinct possibility of me going MIA for several months aka school months. I'll try not to completely neglect this but i don't want to get delayed another semester XD also, i know i don't say this often enough but I really appreciate you guys who still read and wait for this story. I'm not the best writer and i definitely do not update as quickly as I used to so thank you :))

 **Next Chapter: A Secret Makes a Woman, Woman**

Can I just say that I'm excited for the next chapter? XDDD I'll still be looking forward to your guesses on the next chapter :D and i would also appreciate it if you review using an account. I can't reply to anonymous reviews XD

that's all i think. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and that I'll see you in the next one too :D

 **~~61wisampa**


	5. A Secret Makes a Woman, Woman

**Chapter V: A Secret Makes a Woman, Woman**

You tiredly rubbed your eyelids with your thumb and forefinger. It wasn't even lunch yet but already, you were ready to head back to bed.

You had been released from the hospital yesterday, and you, your friends and your Mama had celebrated it with a nice dinner in one of the expensive looking restaurants in the city. You were a little sad that your Papa had had to go on another business trip so soon. You wanted to spend more time with him. He had called you around lunch time that day though, checking up on you and your release.

The dinner had been great, though you found it slightly unfair that you were able to remember which spoon or fork to use in each dish but forgot everything about yourself.

' _Great work, brain.'_

The problem had presented itself when you went back to your dorm. You had seen your room earlier that day (and you were very pleased to see that there was an adorable bear stuffed toy on your bed) wanting to familiarize yourself a little. Your things were all arranged, something that you just knew was your Mama's doing, and when you had sat on your bed to take everything in, it almost felt like you never stopped sleeping there at all. But since your memory was MIA, you failed to predict that your roommate could potentially be a pervert.

Correction, Shirai-san was a complete and utter pervert.

She had tried to do _things_ to you when you had your back turned. Things that you would rather never remember again. It resulted to you accidentally releasing an uncontrolled amount of electricity (thank you, survival instincts) and frying the whole dorm building's circuits (no thank you, angry Dorm Mistress). But since she knew about your condition and the fact that Shirai-san apparently used to harass you on a daily basis (why the _hell_ didn't she tell you?!), she let you off the hook—just this once, she said.

Letting out a tired sigh, you walked around the School Garden. You had hoped that revisiting the places you used to frequent would help jog your memory but so far, nothing had come back to you. The School Garden was rather impressive though, you thought as you looked around the streets. It gave off an ambiance of being in a foreign country. The brick roads and artful streetlight were a huge difference compared to the rest of Academy City. It certainly sent off the vibe of _wealthy ojou-samas._ Until now, you couldn't believe you were actually one of them. You certainly weren't as sophisticated as half the girls who had greeted you in your walk.

That was another thing that had been bothering you. Your Dorm Mistress had warned you to be extremely polite to everybody, especially to strangers. You had known of your reputation as the Level 5 poster girl of Academy City but you hadn't expected your apparent fame within the Garden. It was still a little bit disconcerting.

You kind of wished that Shirai-san, Uiharu-san or Saten-san could come with you today. Unfortunately, the two Judgment members had work and Saten-san had make up classes to attend so you were left to your own devices. You originally wanted to visit Tokiwadai so you won't accidentally get lost on your first day, but the School Garden had been more of a sight than you had expected, distracting you for a while from your goal.

You took your phone—an adorable Gekota style flip phone—and looked at the time. It wasn't lunch yet but it was late enough to warrant getting a snack after breakfast. You looked around you and found a cafe named _Pasticceria Manicagni_. It seemed pretty fancy, seeing as the shop's name was Italian. This fact made you wonder how you even knew what language it was. It could've been some ancient Latin and you shouldn't have known. But then again, you were a little surprised when you had accidentally read a whole book in English and realized only that it wasn't in Japanese when you started telling your friends about it in that language. Uiharu-san and Saten-san barely understood you, and it was only through their shocked and perplexed expressions that you noticed you had been talking in English.

You shook your head, focusing back on the little shop. It seemed quaint and small, but there was some sort of familiarity that tugged you inside. Pushing the door to the shop, the bell clinked as you immediately admired the selection of cakes in your view.

"Welcome!" came the shop's attendant. You stepped closer the transparent shelf that held the cakes, looking at each of them. "What would you like, miss?"

You took a moment to look over the delicious looking cakes before answering. "I'd like a Blueberry cake please." You thought for a moment and decided to get Shirai-san, Saten-san and Uiharu-san some cake as well, adding, "And a Strawberry Costrata, a Monte Blanco and a Cream Cheese Cake to take home."

"My, Misaka-san, I didn't know you had such sweetness ability. Can you really eat all those cakes?" A very feminine voice piped up from behind you.

You turned and saw a girl with long blonde hair and starry eyes smiling mischievously at you. You blinked, thinking for a moment that the eyes must be a mere trick of the light but after staring at them for a good three seconds, you realized they weren't.

"Excuse me," the attendant once again caught your attention, "What tea would you like to order?"

You were still a little too surprised from seeing the girl's eyes so you said the first tea you could think of. "Jasmine, please."

You watched the attendant nod and then retreat to the back of the shop, presumably to brew that tea you had requested, before you turned back to the girl. It was only then that you were able to fully look at her. Thin white gloves that reached high above her elbows, a bag with the same design as her eyes slung on her shoulder and her well-endowed chest. You felt a little irritated looking at it, but you mentally told yourself how ridiculous it is to get mad at a stranger just because she had bigger boobs. You met her eyes and stayed silent for a moment, feeling something stir in your mind the longer you looked at her.

"You see something you like?" the girl smirked wider.

Your brow twitched. "Annoying would be the proper word."

The girl had the gall to giggle. "As always, you were never receptive to my advances."

You blushed at her words. "W-w-what? A-advanc—what are you—"

She broke out into a full on laughter at your response. "Oh my. You're just as easy to tease as ever, Misaka-san! I'm glad that hasn't changed."

You gritted your teeth in irritation and was about to shout back at her when you realized what she had just said. You stopped and looked dumbly at her as you asked, "You... you _know_ me, don't you?"

Her laughter quickly died with your words, seemingly comprehending what exactly you had meant, and all she offered was a sad smile. "I did." She answered quietly.

Her use of tense didn't elude you, and you waited for her to elaborate, but when she didn't, you pressed, albeit hesitantly. "What were you to me?"

She turned away. "A rival, I guess. You didn't like me very much."

You looked at the ground as she said that, feeling a little guilty. You may not remember her but there was something in her gaze, a feeling in your gut, that maybe you could be— _could've been?—_ friends.

You glanced at her again, seeing her still turned away from you, and pensively, you asked her, "What was I to you?"

There was a short moment when she seemed to have frozen, but the next, she was once again smiling mischievously, her _literally_ twinkling starry eyes looking at you with mirth. "Now _that_ is an interesting question, isn't it?"

You let out a sigh, though it sounded more like a groan. "You're not gonna answer me either, are you?" You said when you realized the fact.

"A girl has to keep some secrets to herself after all." She just replied with that annoying smirk of hers.

You narrowed her eyes at her, retorting, "I hate secrets."

"You'll soon learn its importance I assure you."

At that moment, the attendant of the cafe returned, pointing you to a small table where they had set your cake and tea. You nodded to the employee in thanks and turned back to the girl, contemplating only for a second before saying, "You wanna join me for a little while?"

She shook her head. "Ah-ah, Misaka-san. If you're gonna use your persuasion ability to get me to tell you I—"

"I'm not gonna ask, I promise." You told her, because as tired as you were of the secrets, you were also getting sick of having to ask people you didn't know you knew. You jerked your head towards the direction of your table and offered her a small smile. "C'mon. It's my treat."

She stared back at you for a long moment, before you witnessed her eyes soften and say, "Okay."

If you two weren't friends before, maybe this was your second chance to be one.

–

Shoukuhou Misaki was an odd girl, you thought as you made your way back to your dorm. You were passing through the park as you recalled your little meeting with the blonde.

She had teased you mercilessly, irritating you at first, and you had teased her back, once you found out her weaknesses—she was horribly physically unfit but loved stuffing herself with food that will only help her gain weight.

After a while though, you eased into a more civilized conversation. You had learned—or rather, _relearned—_ that she was the 5th Level 5 and was the most powerful psychic in Academy City. You had asked her if she could read your mind too and had said that no, she couldn't because of the electrobarrier created by your ability. You had asked her to try anyway—curiosity killed the cat—and even though she was reluctant, because apparently your doctor had told her not to put any more pressure on you, she agreed after you had incessantly requested it. You immediately regretted it because it had hurt like _hell_ which resulted to her telling you _'I told you so,'_ with a shrug.

In the end, you two had exchanged numbers ("Take care of it, Misaka-san. Not many have the privilege of getting the Queen's number so try not to let it get leaked.") and you felt like it was a start of a great friendship that would've probably never existed if you hadn't lost your memory.

Maybe forgetting everything wasn't so bad after all.

You smiled to yourself, swinging the bag of cakes that you held in your right hand lightly as you walked. The last few days had been stressful, with all the secrets and going back to your dorm and your pervert roommate trying to harass you. It was nice talking to Shokuhou. It was nice meeting another friend.

You bumped lightly with someone as you turned around the corner, and you immediately jumped back, apologizing. "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it." The boy you had bumped into merely continued to walk, looking nonchalantly in front of him. You weren't even able to see his face, and you watched him walk away. You were about to turn around when he spoke again. "Ah, Number 3."

You looked at him in surprise, and he still had his back to you when he tossed you something. You caught it with both hands as he said, "Something as thanks."

You blinked at him and looked at what he had thrown, seeing a bar of chocolate. You quirked an eyebrow in confusion. "Hey, wait, what's—" you began, but when you looked up, he was gone.

You were pretty sure he was a Level 5. Who else would call you by rank? Shokuhou had mentioned it was a weird form of endearment (like hell) or acknowledgement between you seven. You chose not to question it at that point. It must've been lucky of you to find four of the remaining six Level 5s, you thought dryly, although they had been the one to visit you, you were sure.

You stared at the empty space where you saw him last, and let out a sigh, muttering to yourself, "What is it with Level 5s and dramatics?"

–

 _You pounded at the closed door in front of you as you tried to catch your breath. You didn't want to be here. And you_ really _didn't want to do this but you had no choice._

 _The door opened to reveal Shokuhou's eyes wide in surprise. It only lasted for a second though before she reverted back to her usual demeanor whenever she would talk to you. She smirked a little as she crossed her arms. "Oh my. To what do I owe the pleasure of Misaka-san visiting me in my dorm room. I didn't know you even knew my room. Were you perhaps stalking me?"_

 _The usual irritation that her words always brought came to you and you snapped back at her before you could think. "I don't have time for this." You growled lowly at her and her face dropped into a serious expression. Her eyes narrowed as you glared right back at her. You swallowed. Normally, your pride would never let yourself ask Shokuhou—of all people—for help, but you were desperate and your pride wasn't worth a damn compared to_ him _being safe. "I need your help."_

 _She let out a mocking snort, tossing her long blonde hair behind her with a hand. "And since when did you need_ my _help, Misaka-san?"_

 _"_ _I know that you know what's happening out there." You gritted your teeth. She was pushing your buttons again, you knew, but you didn't have the patience to deal with it right now. "And I know you and I were never friends but I need your help because I can't do this alone."_

 _She gave you a deadpanned look. "What makes you think that I'll risk my own neck for you?"_

 _"_ _Then do it for him!" You shouted. You were mildly aware of the stares that your conversation had gathered but you ignored them, locking with Shokuhou's gaze. "I don't know what your history is with him, but right now I don't care!"_

 _You two held gazes, waiting for the other to submit first. But after a moment, you felt desperation seize your heart once again. You couldn't do this alone, and if she said no, your chances of saving him would drop. He could die without her help. You took a step back, unflinching from the eyebrow that she rose at your action, and bowed._

 _"_ _Please..." you asked in a whisper as you looked at your shoes, desperation coating your voice, "Please help me save him."_

 _You felt her move and you closed your eyes, readying yourself for the slamming of her door. But instead, you felt warm hands push against your shoulders, straightening your body as she murmured, "As if you even had to beg, Misaka-san."_

 _You looked at her with wide eyes, surprised at the softness of her voice. For the first time, you witnessed her truly smile and you thought briefly that if this was the real Shokuhou, you would'nt have minded being her friend._

 _The sound of her remote brought you back to your senses and you gave her a disapproving glance. She must've caught it because she said, "We can't let anyone know about our conversation. I'd rather leave my clique out of this mess."_

 _The corners of your mouth began to twitch up. "I guess you're just another softie after all."_

 _She turned snobbishly away from you. "Hmp. I do not know what you are talking about."_

 _You felt your heart lighten. You have more help. You can do this. You could save him._

 _"_ _I'll need to do some preparations." She told you, catching your eyes. "I'm assuming you'll seek for the others as well? Number 6 is a little elusive but I know how to track him down."_

 _You nodded. "Yes, please. It's why I went to you first."_

 _"_ _Don't I feel special." She remarked playfully, and you even managed to let out a soft laugh. You met gazes once again and she said, "Now let's go and save our damn idiot of a hero, shall we?"_

 _A grin was your reply. "Let's."_

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

I have to say this is one of my favorite chapters so far XD Also, in my mind NT11 never happened so yeah

Let me just say I'm not supposed to be posting this because i am basically procrastinating and i'm dying of all my school requirements and yeah i'll keep this author's notes short coz i'm coding right now XD

 **Next Chapter: Call Me By My Name**

This one's easy to guess. i think. maybe. probably not. but yeah.

Thank for reading!

 **~61wisampa**


	6. Call Me By My Name

**Chapter VI: Call Me by My Name**

 _"_ _Onee-sama..."_

 _You froze when you heard your roommate's voice, your hand hovering over the remaining tokens from your Gekota coin bank. After a moment, you resumed your work, putting the rest of the coins into your pocket and rearranging your coin bank as you said, "Welcome back, Kuroko. How was Judgment work?"_

 _You turned around just in time to see her open her mouth before stopping herself. She seemed conflicted and hesitant. You merely looked back at her blankly, giving nothing away as you waited for her to answer. When she did, she pointedly look away from you. "It was fine. AntiSkill had let us leave for the night. They said they'd takeover the night shifts in guarding the Windowless building so our help isn't needed at the moment."_

 _You watched her as she fidgeted under your gaze, rubbing her arm self-consciously as she took quick glances from you. You gave her a smile. "That's great then. At least you'll have some rest. I know you've been stressed these past few days because of your Judgment work. Try to loosen up a little, even just tonight."_

 _"_ _And you, Onee-sama?" she asked, sending you a pleading gaze, "What do you plan to do tonight?"_

 _You looked down at your feet. You weren't a fool, and she wasn't either. She knew what you were intending to do, and you knew she did._

 _"_ _I have some stuff to take care of. Don't wait up for me." You sent her what you hoped was a reassuring smile, but it was obvious that it didn't have its intended effect._

 _Her brows furrowed deeper and you tried to ignore it. The other six would be waiting for you. You had to leave now._

 _You began to walk towards the door, stopping for a moment beside her as you faced the opposite sides of your room. You hesitated only for a moment before putting a hand on top of head and saying, "I'll be going now, Kuroko."_

 _You made your way to the door silently. You opened it, only to stop midway when she called out to you again._

 _"_ _Onee-sama," her voice was soft and sad, and you chose not to turn her way so you wouldn't have to see the expression that was on her face. She didn't need to know. She didn't need to get involved. It was better this way. You heard her take a breath, before saying in a happier tone, "Take care."_

 _You can't help but smile a little, and with your back still facing her, you nodded. "I will."_

* * *

"I swear, Shirai-san, if you do this stunt one more time I _will_ shock you until you're as black as your name!" You growled as you stomped your foot on the back of your currently tied up roommate.

Shirai-san was on the floor, her arms tied securely behind her back and her ankles in the same tight bind. She had _once again_ snuck into the bathroom while you were taking a bath and tried to do... _things_ with you, and it took all of your self-restraint not to shock her the moment you saw her. You had been surrounded by water after all and though your roommate's crimes could very well deserve a death penalty, you didn't really want to hurt her... _that much_.

Plus, the Dorm Mistress still terrified you and you wanted to live until tomorrow.

You now stood at the doorway of the bathroom behind Shirai-san who was still on the floor. You had enough decency to put a towel around you and drape another on top of your pervert of a roommate before tying her up, so thankfully, nothing important was in plain sight. Still, the whole thing had really left a mark and you were sure you were scarred for the rest of your life. It had been more than fifteen minutes since she had barged in and you had thrown all the bottles you could reach at her face, and the blush had yet to fade. You had never been so embarrassed in your life.

Shirai-san let out a whiny tone. "But Onee-sama~ I was only looking for some skinship! We have not had any time for ourselves and—"

"And you thought that barging in while I took a bath was a great idea?! I COULD CHARGE YOU FOR SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!"

"Mou~ but Onee-sama—"

"Stop. Just, _stop_." You rubbed your temples before pinching the bridge of your nose, trying to dissipate the growing stress in your body. As much as you appreciate your friend helping you regain your memories by acting normal around you, it was a little too much for you to handle something like this right now. It hadn't even been a _week_ since you got released for heaven's sake and already, Shirai-san had been trying to do things to you that was a little too much for someone you had only met a little over two weeks ago.

In all honesty though, you _didn't_ want to get used to this. How in the world did your previous self handle this?

You let out a tired sigh. You noticed that she had stopped squirming so you decided to loosen the strings. You knew she could've teleported herself out of it—she was obviously not afraid to break some of the dorm's rules as long as the Dorm Mistress never found out—so you guessed that it was her own little way of showing you that she _would_ stop if you really didn't like it, and that she was, to some extent, merely joking. But sometimes, jokes could go too far and she had really picked the wrong time for it.

Once the thin ropes were loose, she pushed herself up from the floor and you turned around, giving her the privacy she had not given you to fix herself. You were still honestly a little irritated too so you just told her, "I'll finish taking a bath. Once I get out, _and only when I get out,_ you can take yours."

You felt her stand up and retreat, before murmuring a soft response. "Alright, Onee-sama."

You went back into the bathroom and closed the door without another word.

* * *

Shirai-san was thankfully quiet for the rest of the night. You honestly weren't in the mood to talk so you appreciated it. You were still a little mad for the incident earlier, and you knew she must've sensed it because she stayed clear from you.

You sat on your bed, your back against the wall, reading a book in English that your mother had given you before she left Academy City a few days before. It was a pretty cute romance novel about two people who met in an airport, and ended up taking the same plane with their seats next to each other. Your mood had considerably lightened because of it.

It was then that Shirai-san cautiously spoke for the first time since the incident. "Onee-sama?"

Her nervous voice immediately caught your attention, but you feigned disinterest and simply let out a questioning hum in reply.

"I'm sorry." You finally looked up when she said that, and you found her standing in front of you as she fiddled with her thumbs. You raised an eyebrow to prompt her to continue. "I shouldn't have done what I did. I went too far, and I apologize for that."

"Are you apologizing because you pushed me too far, or because you know what you did was wrong?" you asked back.

"I uhm..." she looked to the side, avoiding your gaze, "I—both?"

You sighed, grabbing your phone and using it as a temporary bookmark as you set aside the book you were reading. "Look, you probably meant well, Shirai-san,"—although right now you had no idea how—"but even though this was a normal occurrence between the two of us before, you have to remember that I'd only just met you. It would take me some time to grow... _tolerant_ of your actions, and until then, all I ask of you is to tone it down a bit." You told her softly as she once again met your gaze. "And I'm sorry that I have to point this out, but I'm not the Misaka Mikoto that you knew—not yet, at least, and it would take a while to get her back."

She must've caught on to some of your current insecurities because she violently shook her head in disagreement. "That's not true, Onee-sama! You're you. You may not believe it but you're still the same Onee-sama that I know and love. Sometimes, I even forget that you had lost your memories but then—" she suddenly cut herself off and shook her head again, "It is all my doing. I had gone too far. Even if you had not lost your memories, it would've still been too much for you. I am sorry I got carried away."

"It's alright." You told her gently, smiling. "I'll try not to get too mad next time too as long as you promise not to go too far again."

She smiled back. "I will."

She was about to go back to her desk when you called out to her, making her halt. "Shirai-san?"

She turned to you. "Yes?"

"Why do you call me Onee-sama?"

She was frozen for a moment before her face melted into a melancholic smile. You wondered if you had said something wrong. "It's a rather long story, Onee-sama."

Maybe it was selfish, it was obvious that the memory was only making her sad, but you want to know why Shirai Kuroko was so special that Misaka Mikoto had let her call her big sister even though she was a complete and utter pervert.

"We have time." You insisted.

Her smile widened a little as she sat down on her bed, facing you. Maybe it wasn't the wrong thing to ask after all.

* * *

You two had been talking for more than an hour when she finished. Your first meeting in the alley, your supposed delinquencies, the junior-freshman partnership thing, the spice research facility, the kidnapping; the facts almost went over your head, but in the end, you were able to get more information about your friendship with Shirai-san than you had hoped for.

"Do I even want to know how you managed to switch rooms to be my roommate?" You asked her amusedly, "I thought you needed my signature for that?"

"That is a secret that you best not know, Onee-sama." Shirai-san proudly said.

You just laughed. "I can't believe we got into all that trouble just a few weeks after we met."

"You have a talent for getting into trouble, that much I've learned."

You merely grinned at her. "Well, thank you for telling me, Shirai-san. I really appreciate it."

"It is no big matter, Onee-sama. I'm just glad I was able to help."

"I should thank you for taking care of me all the time too. I sounded like such a handful. I'll treat you to lunch tomorrow as thanks."

She shook her head. "You do not have to do that, Onee-sama, but..." she suddenly became hesitant before saying, "I have something to ask of you."

You looked at her in curiosity. "What is it?"

"Can you please call me Kuroko?" she asked, almost shyly. "It had always been how you addressed me, and I would appreciate it if you do so again... but if you're not comfortable, I completely understand—"

"Alright, Kuroko," her eyes widened at your words and you gave her a cheeky grin, "We should go to sleep. It's late."

She was beaming as she said, "Hai, Onee-sama!"

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

Hi, I'm alive! :DDD yyyeeaaaahh. but anyway! The story-of-how-Mikoto-and-Kuroko-met that was mentioned above is actually based on a fanfiction story **_A Certain Destined Introduction_ by Cun**-sama. XD I distinctly remember asking her about it and she gave me permission! I'm pretty sure everyone has read that story and to be honest, I proclaim it as canon :D

Anyways! If anyone is still reading, thanks! Also, this is self beta'd so there are mistakes there somewhere probably. so tell me :)))

By the way, I don't know if anyone noticed, but aside from the first scene on the first chapter (a scene which is set after this chapter), Mikoto only ever called Kuroko as Shirai-san :)))) see! The Chapter titles are not random!

 **Next Chapter: Our Third First Meeting**

 **HMMM...** I WONDER WHO THIS ONE WILL BE

XD

Please tell me it's as obvious as I think it is

 **~~61wisampa**


	7. Our Third First Meeting

**Chapter VII: Our Third First Meeting**

 _The bright pillar of light shot from the ground towards the dark sky, and the wind whipped around you in a storm, forcing you back._

 _The light hurt your eyes but you didn't care. You lifted your arms in front of your face in an attempt to block the wind and light. You strained to look at the bottom of this pillar of light, trying to get even just a glimpse of him. Just a shadow of him and you were good._

 _You needed to know he was alive._

 _But as you narrowed your eyes to look for him, you spotted his sprawled out form a mere few meters from where the pillar of light stood. Your breath caught as you stared at him._

 _He wasn't moving._

 _His name left your lips in a desperate shout. You reached out to him, extending your left hand as far as you could, wishing—for the impossible—that it would reach him._

 _A stronger gust of wind threw you back._

* * *

Going back to school hadn't been so bad. Your condition had been kept at a low note for, according to the director, your safety. You weren't sure what that meant or what exactly it entailed (at least, you were hoping that it was just your overactive imagination at work when you considered that there were people trying to assassinate you. The fact that two of the Level 5s had once visited you to tell you they'd protect you didn't help calm the ludicrous imagination either), but it forced you to act polite and friendly to everyone like you knew them. You had to memorize all your previous classmates' names and others you supposedly interact with frequently, and it was wearing you down faster than you had ever expected. The recent dreams you've been having didn't help in the slightest, zapping whatever energy was left in you. Somehow, you felt like the dreams were important but you could barely remember them once you woke up, doing nothing but exhaust you before your day could even start. By the end of your last period, you all but escaped the School Garden in favor of walking around the city by yourself.

You still recalled some of the places your friends had showed you that one time you went to the arcade. It had been an hour since you left school, and you were feeling thirsty after walking around. You remembered there was a vending machine around the park though so you decided that as your next destination.

To be honest, the vending machine didn't look very promising.

It looked worn. It wasn't old but it looked overused. There were dents on the right side of the machine and it seemed like it had to have been repaired more than a few times. But you were getting really thirsty and the closest convenience store was another block away so you decided to just settle for it.

You dug your pocket for some change but found none. You took out your Gekota wallet, and your eye twitched.

"...five thousand yen...?" you mumbled as you stared at the bills in your wallet. While you certainly have more than five thousand on hand (that wasn't the issue though), you obviously lacked the coins that was needed for the vending machine.

You stared at it for a moment, conflicted. For some reason, your gut was telling you not to trust this dingy machine. It already looked a little suspicious but there was a nagging thought in your head that seemed convinced that the machine was giving off an aura that clearly said _'Evil Vending Machine'_ even though you couldn't really remember what wrong the electronic juice dispenser had ever done to you.

After a moment of indecision, you took out your smallest bill (which was the five thousand yen) and fed it to the vending machine.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Before the machine could get the bill, a high school boy (based on his uniform) suddenly grabbed your wrist, pushing the hand that held your money away from the machine.

You looked at him in slight surprise, confused as to why this spiky black haired boy had suddenly appeared and why he stopped you. "What?"

"Sorry, but you can't buy from this vending machine." He said, and your brow rose in confusion. "This thing eats bills, you know."

You lowered the hand with your money (and the one he had been holding), and frowned at the vending machine. "But... I'm thirsty." You told him, and for a moment, you thought of how silly you had sounded with your complaint. You ignored it though because you _were_ really thirsty and needed a drink. You remembered the convenience store a block away and almost pouted at the thought of walking there just to get a drink. "And I don't have any change." You mumbled silently to yourself.

Before you could decided whether it was worth getting your five thousand yen eaten to save yourself from walking a block, the boy's hands were suddenly in front of you, inserting coins into the coin slot. Before you could comprehend what he had just done, he said, "There, you can choose one now."

You blinked, taken aback by his sudden actions. "Huh? Wait, that was your money!"

"I know," he easily replied, "And I said you can pick a juice now. Or would you rather walk to that convenience store on the next block for a drink?"

You shook your head, "That's not the point. I can't just make you buy me a drink."

"You didn't. I chose to buy you one."

"But I—"

"Just pick one, will you?" he interrupted you in an amused tone, smiling lightly, "Seriously, it's not a big deal."

You opened your mouth again to argue but stopped yourself. Here was a guy you didn't even know saving you from getting your money eaten and treating you to a free drink, and you did nothing but complain? "Okay... thanks." You said, pushing the button for Coconut cider and listening to the can drop.

Once you got your drink, he once again inserted some coins and this time, chose a drink for himself. You took a step back to give him room to grab his drink as you opened your own can. You watched him intently the whole time, feeling a small tug in your mind. You felt like you've seen him before: the spiky black hair, the dark blue eyes and the easy going smile. There was also a tug at your chest that you couldn't explain, a feeling of longing you couldn't comprehend.

"Is there something on my face?"

His voice brought you out of your reverie and you instantly blushed at being caught staring. You shook your head in an attempt to save face, stuttering out, "N-nothing."

He was obviously unconvinced as he scrutinized you but let the matter go with a hum. He finished his drink without moving from his spot while you stared at your can, stealing glances from him.

You were once again openly staring when he finished his juice and threw away the can on the trash bin beside the vending machine, but this time, curiosity won over and you asked, "Do I know you?"

He turned to you with a light grin and a shrug. "I don't know... do you?" he asked cryptically.

You frowned a little at his tone. "I..." you trailed off, unsure whether you should tell this possibly complete stranger of your condition. But somehow, there was an unexplainable sense of trust that you felt for him, and it only made you more confused. Still, you told him albeit hesitantly, "I have problems with my memories."

He was quiet for a moment, but his sudden blank expression revealed nothing if he was even surprised or not. "Is that so?" he mumbled after a second, and then his smirk was back on his face. "Well, do you remember if you know me?"

Your immediate response was to look at him dryly and say, "Of course not. That's why I'm asking you, you idiot."

You weren't sure but you thought his smile faltered at your words. "I see..." He said, almost sadly. But then he was smiling again so quickly that you brushed it off as a trick of the light. "Well, once you do remember, tell me. I always pass by here." He said before walking away, leaving you with your half-empty can of juice in front of the vending machine.

* * *

"Hey, Kuroko?" You began as you and your kouhai made your way to the family restaurant where you would be meeting up with Saten-san and Uiharu-san. You passed by the vending machine at the park, and it made you remember.

"Yes, Onee-sama?"

You paused for just a moment before asking, "Did I know a guy—a high school student, with black spiky hair and dark blue eyes?" you asked, gesticulating each description.

There was a flash of recognition on her face but she covered it up so quickly that you had almost missed it. Her expression was back to normal, as if nothing happened, as she answered you. "I cannot confirm or deny that you did, seeing as you had suitors that you had never bothered to introduce to us."

Your face contorted into a grimace. "S-suitors?"

She nodded, smiling lightly, "I couldn't blame Onee-sama though. I knew you never liked any of them. But back to the point, this boy you are referring to may be one of those. I cannot be sure though."

After shaking off the uncomfortable thought of actually having suitors, you considered what your friend had just told you. You didn't want to accuse but you weren't convinced that Kuroko was telling the truth. Plus, the boy hadn't acted like a suitor. He didn't flirt or anything, and he didn't even introduce himself when you told him that you don't remember him. "I don't think he's a suitor." You mumbled absently under your breath.

Kuroko seemed to have heard you because she asked, "Why not?"

You opened your mouth to explain; to tell her how the boy had been friendly to you, how he had helped you but didn't even ask for your name, and how he had smiled at you so easily with those gentle dark blue orbs that made something stir within your stomach.

He didn't tell you, but you were almost certain that he knew you and that he had known you didn't remember him.

You shook your head, dismissing the ludicrous thoughts. You were probably just overthinking and looking too much into things again. "Never mind. Let's hurry and meet up with the rest."

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

I guess by now you know that I only update when I'm trying to procrastinate so! Take a wild guess how much stuff I have to do now! :DDDD

Also, Oxenfree is such a good game and i would either continue playing it until the wee hours of the night (again) or post this chapter. I chose this one because hey. I actually need sleep. And I promised one of you i won't take five months this time

Fair warning though. next chapter **might** take a while

 **Also** I hope you aren't too disappointed about this chapter XDDD not a lot happened here and Mikoto doesn't even _know_ it's Touma but at least we all do, right? and c'mon, first meeting yaaaaaayy! of course this won't be his last. I think he'll have the most chapters... i think... but yaaaaaayyy!

 **Next Chapter: You Put the Caps in GUTS!**

 **NOW WHO COULD THIS BE?**

seriously though. These two chapters have been give aways when it comes to the whole 'guess who's next?' game XD

wish me luck so I won't fail my classes and I'll graduate this semester

 **~~61wisampa**


	8. You Put the Caps in GUTS

**VIII: You Put the Caps in GUTS!**

Your eye twitched as another one of your attempts to get the highest score in an arcade game was crushed because of an unbelievably high score that was currently on almost all of the arcade's machines. You knew you were doing really well in every game—if the crowd that always gathered around you was any indication—but every time, your score would be a few hundred points short from the first rank, the same name over and over again.

It was ' _Mikoto'_.

You were very certain that it was _previous you_ who got all those high scores.

You almost slammed the gun back into the game's holster. For some reason, it really irritated you. All you had wanted to do was to have fun in the arcade while waiting for your friends to finish whatever it was that they were doing, but instead, Misaka Mikoto's mark had once again appeared in front of you just as it had been doing from the moment you had woken up.

You clenched your fists and glared at the name on the screen. You couldn't explain it but you wanted to beat her— _your past self_. Maybe it was silly but you didn't want to lose, even if it was just a simple game. You didn't want her to win.

Maybe it was illogical, but you felt like everything about the original _Misaka Mikoto_ was challenging you, taunting you to do better than her. And an irrational part of you wanted to take that challenge, to prove that you were just as good as her, if not better.

You wanted to get off of this shadow of your old self that had been hovering over you since you woke.

You knew it was stupid. Hell, even inside your head you knew you were being irrational. But you just couldn't stand staying under Misaka Mikoto's name even if she was technically you before you lost your memories. You felt like a ferromagnetic material that had been exposed to a magnetic field for too long; your magnetization curve became messed up and though you can still somehow be of use, hysteresis would have taken over your life and you would never get that original magnetization curve back ever again. You ignored the fact that hysteresis was the most basic form of memory though because one, it would make it sound like your situation was actually a good thing rather than how bad you thought it was; and two, you didn't really realize it could be considered a joke until you thought it through. You compared your memory loss to hysteresis when, in its most basic use, it _was_ memory.

 _Oh, the irony._

You stopped for a moment to pinch the bridge of your nose at your thoughts. You had become convinced that Misaka Mikoto was a little insane, that she had a few screws loose in her brain, and it was one of these moments where your thoughts dragged off into some incomprehensible (to most people) things yet still fully make sense to you. It was a little alarming to say the least because you were aware that you technically have Misaka Mikoto's brain which meant you, in all logical sense, were insane as well.

"Stop. Stop. _Stop._ " You hit your forehead with your palm with every repetition of the word. You were aware that your thoughts were bordering on _fucking weird_ and you wanted to keep your sanity for as long as you could—if you still have it, that is.

You let out a frustrated groan, dragging a palm down your face. You noticed a kid looking at the game and moved away, giving him a chance to play it. You sighed as you rubbed your temples. "This was a mistake. Why did I go here? I knew she used to hang out here a lot so why didn't I avoid this place when I was having some serious identity crisis?"

You shoved your hand into your skirt pocket and felt how many coins you had left. You had bought fifty tokens and you barely used up half of it because of how good you had turned out to be in games. You knew you couldn't exchange the tokens back for money, and you didn't want to play anymore. Mentally, you just decided to keep the tokens for the next time you came back.

"And I'll definitely take someone with me." You mumbled to yourself, still feeling a little irritated at the whole thing.

You made your way out of the arcade, pushing the glass doors as you took a deep breath. Going outside was a relief. The arcade was pretty cramped with people, and the noise was loud and constant. You realized you had less than ten minutes until you had to meet up with your friends at the park so you began to run, but before you could go far, you were stopped when someone suddenly spoke.

"You stealing arcade tokens again, Railgun? I know you need it for your special attack, but it's illegal you know."

Your head snapped back to look at the boy who had spoken. He was wearing a uniform you didn't recognize: grey slacks, white collared shirt and a grey vest. His hair was neat but not overly so, framing his face. He looked really normal and quite forgettable if you were being honest, but he had called you by your Level 5 nickname so you were pretty sure he was anything but normal.

You frowned a little when you couldn't deduce who he could possibly be and instead just asked, "Do I know you?"

He smiled widely. "Yes, as a matter of fact, you do." He walked towards you, stopping when he was just a few feet away and holding out his hand for what you assumed was a handshake. "Sogiita Gunha, or as you would know, Number 7. It's nice to meet you again, Misaka."

You brow rose at this but took his hand anyway. Not only were you surprised that you met another Level 5—(you could swear they were stalking you)—but Sogiita didn't seem as guarded as the ones you've met before. You weren't sure if that was a good thing or not. "Uhm... nice to meet you too, I guess?"

He let out a chuckle before letting go. "So how about those arcade coins. You should return them, you know. I may be off duty right now, but I'm still a Judgment member. I wouldn't want to arrest you when I owe you a lot."

"It wasn't like I was stealing them, I just didn't use them all up, and since this place doesn't offer refunds, I thought I could just go back next time." You explained, and then you blinked, finally realizing what he had first said. "Wait, what do you mean I need arcade coins for my special attack?"

He blinked at you for a second. "Wait, you mean to tell me no one has told you about your signature move?"

"Of course they have." You crossed your arms, recalling how that conversation had gone. It involved Saten-san doing countless sound effects of explosions and you telling yourself to never use it again. "My Level 5 nickname was from that, right? I know how railguns work but how is that even related to tokens?"

He gave you an amused look as if saying _'You really don't know?'_.

You stared at him for a moment and then muttered. "Oh. _Oh._ " You thumped your palm against the underside of your fist in realization. "They're the projectiles."

"Yup! Pretty neat idea, might I say, but illegal too. Don't tell me you're stocking up?"

You smiled a little at his jibe. "Maybe I should." Your phone suddenly let out frog noises and you held a finger up. "Just a sec."

You pulled your phone out from your pocket and checked the message you received, seeing that it was from Kuroko, asking where you were.

You quickly typed up a reply before looking back at Sogiita and saying, "Sorry, I have to meet up with my friends right now."

He shrugged. "Sure. Can I walk with you? I have been meaning to talk to you."

"Sure. I don't mind." You sent him a smirk. "But how about those arcade coins I'm ' _stealing'_. Shouldn't you make me give them back?" You asked as the two of you began to walk.

He let out a laugh. "I'll let you off just this once because you were planning on going back to use those. Plus, I know you used up all your coins the last time so you really do need to stock up. You might need it."

His words made you turn to him. "Last time?"

He shook his head. "Sorry. I can't—"

"You're not allowed to tell me, I know." You grumbled. You really should've known though. "I still don't understand why I can't be told about it. Why is that part of my memory so important that I have to remember it myself? How is it different from the rest of my memories?"

He put his hands up defensively. "Hey, I have no idea either. And personally, I don't get it either, but rules are rules. That Heaven Canceller saved your life, so if he said that it's what's best for you, none of us could really complain."

You groaned, putting your face on your hands. "I'm just getting tired of all the secrecy. This is _my_ life, _my_ past, and I have the right to get it back."

He slapped you quite strongly on your back, almost making you stumble. He didn't seem to care. "Don't worry. It's probably just precaution for the worst case. It'll come back to you in time."

You sent him a weak glare but he ignored it. You decided to do the mature thing and just let it go, so instead, you grumbled, "I'm tired of hearing that sentence."

"You probably are, huh?" he replied, sounding a little somber. You turned your head and saw a wistful look on his face. But after another moment, he shook his head and the look was gone. "By the way, I never got to thank you for that. Even though I'm pretty much immortal with my ability, I don't think I would've survived that incident. You really were amazing back there."

You blushed a little at the compliment, and you turned your gaze to the pavement in front of you. It was suddenly very interesting... oooh, a crack. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. You really showed a lot of GUTS!"

His sudden change of tone snapped your gaze back to him, and you were surprised to see his abrupt costume change. A bandana was suddenly wrapped around his forehead, holding his hair up, his vest was on the ground and his school shirt was hanging from his neck making it look like a cape. His t-shirt had a very distinct red sun print on it, and he grinned at you as you stared.

"I would tell you just how GUTSY you were, but I can't. No words can describe how much GUTS you showed!" he continued babbling while you continued to gape, "But getting hurt to save your friends and losing your memories in the process? Now that's GUTS!"

You rubbed your temples as the scene sank in. You thought you finally found a normal Level 5 but _nooooooo_ because apparently, insanity was a prerequisite to become a Level 5. Maybe that was why your screws were pretty loose too.

"What the hell? Are you bipolar or something?" you asked. Later, you would hit your head repeatedly when you realized how rude and inappropriate it was that you said.

He merely grinned back and said. "Now don't be like that, Misaka. I can't help it if I get hyped when talking about your GUTS!"

"...please stop saying guts. It's starting to sound like you want to slash my belly open and rip my intestines out..."

"And now it sounds like _you're_ starting lose your GUTS!"

"That's it. You and me, duel. Right now!"

He guffawed at your outburst. "Now there's the GUTS I was looking for! You haven't lost yourself after all."

The fist that you had clenched when you shouted at him immediately loosened, and the glare you had faded. He might've not realized it yet but his words meant a lot to you. Just when you were starting to have a serious case of self-doubt, he came and said it so easily that you could actually believe he was telling the truth.

You let out a soft giggle, shaking your head. These Level 5s maybe a little off their rocker but they weren't so bad. And even without your memories to back you up, you felt glad that you were able to stand by them in whatever mess you had found yourself in a few weeks ago.

"Thanks, Sogiita. That's just what I needed to hear." You smiled at him, and he grinned back widely.

He crossed his arms and the two of you stopped. You looked around and was surprised to find yourself at the entrance of the park. "Well, we're here now. It was nice meeting with you again. It'd be great if us Level 5s can go out together. None of the others would actually admit it, but we had an awesome time! Ignoring the fact that we were fighting for our lives, of course."

You laughed at that. "Yeah, I'm not sure that's a good idea. Who knows how much destruction we can cause if all seven Level 5s come together for lunch?"

"A GUTSY amount of destruction, that's what!"

The two of you laughed, only to be interrupted by someone calling out your name. The two of you turned to see your friends waving at you by a bench. You sent a small wave back before turing back to Sogiita.

"Well, that's my cue." He said, the grin never leaving his face. He gave you a mock salute. "I'll see you around, Miss Railgun."

You nodded, offering a smile back. "See you then."

You watched him turn around and walk away for a moment before looking back at your friends. You began to head towards them, but you stopped when Sogiita once again called out.

"Hey, Misaka!" When you faced him, he was grinning as he shouted at you. "I just want to tell you that you're the person I've met with the most GUTS!"

* * *

 _You ran towards the school gates as fast as you could, using your ability to easily jump over it. Without stopping, you scanned the school building with your eyes, remembering which window was Number 7's classroom._

 _"_ _Hey! What are you doing here?!"_

 _You mildly heard someone shouting at you—probably a teacher—and ignored it. You locked onto your destination and saw the person you were looking for staring back at you. You held his gaze and without hesitation, jumped towards the building wall, using your ability to keep yourself glued to it using magnetism. Louder shouts reached your ears but you didn't pay them any mind, completely focused on your task._

 _When you reached the window on the third floor, Number 7 had already opened it, standing a little ways away from the open window and letting you crouch on the sill. He had his arms crossed when you halted, an eyebrow raised in question._

 _He was still in his 'normal mode' (as you'd like to call it) when he said, "This is a surprise. Didn't think I'd see you in these circumstances, missy."_

 _Your brow twitched, narrowing your eyes at him as you remembered the nickname he had used on you when you two had met at the park for the first time. For a moment, you considered the possibility that he may not be as involved as you thought, but you shook that idea away when you remembered what had happened during the last Daihaseisai. "You know me, right?"_

 _He smirked a little. "'Course I do. I don't just forget people who has shown me a lot of guts, Miss Railgun."_

 _There was an almost unanimous murmur when he said that, and only then did you realize that you had interrupted his class. Everyone else had been silent since you barged in, and it was only then that you noticed their presence._

 _Your eyes darted quickly around before settling back to him. "I need your help."_

 _He looked thoughtful for a moment before asking, "Is this about that incident near the windowless building?"_

 _"_ _Yes, but there's much more to it than that." You explained, never wavering your gaze. You knew you had more chance asking Sogiita for help compared to others, so you hoped you wouldn't blow this up. "I just want to tell you that this isn't a recruitment for a vigilante mission to save Academy City, so I don't expect you to risk your life or anything."_

 _He stared back at you, waiting for you to finish as you gathered your words._

 _Finally, you took a breath and said, "I need your help to save someone."_

 _His head titled a little to the side. "'To save someone', huh? Is this in any way related to Kamijou?"_

 _Your jaw tightened. "What do you expect?"_

 _He let out a laugh at this. "Well, that just means I have to go then. That guy gets into too much trouble on his own."_

 _You smiled a little at his words, feeling relief wash over you. "Thank you."_

 _He waved your words off. "Don't thank me yet. So what's the plan?"_

 _You dug into your pocket and pulled out a piece of folded paper, throwing it to him. He caught it easily with his hand. "I'll see you then, Sogiita."_

 _He only had enough time to send you a mock salute before you jumped off the building and ran away from the teachers that had gathered to stop you. Again, you ignored all of them, focusing on your next destination._

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

 _ **Mental illnesses are no joke and one should not do what Mikoto has done. One should hit one's self on the head after making a very rude comment about being bipolar, and apologize. One should then make sure never to do it again.**_

*peeks from the corner* so... hey! uhm... i see the last time i updated was September 24 but... hey at least it didn't take longer than 5 months! :DDD look on the bright side! I graduated! and now comes the more difficult part... **finding a job**

but anyway! writing Gunha is fun! He's a normal guy in normal mode but when in Hero mode he's just funny XD also i have a headcanon that Mikoto is an arcade master so sorry! but seriously, what else was she doing with all those tokens? aside from shooting them at unsuspecting idiots i mean XD

also, can you imagine how EPIC a lunch with all the Level 5s would be? And how awesome it would be if they're all friends?! UUUGGGHHH it is so great inside my head. THEY CAN RULE THE WORLD

I'll try to update as soon as I finish the chapter D: but weeeew my other fandoms are bringing it up and I have no idea where To Aru light novels are headed. Hopefully, my love for Mikoto and Kamikoto will be enough to see this story through

 **Next Chapter: Just Like Back Then**

Hah! Back to the ambiguous chapter titles! Let's see who gets this chapter this time! XDD

i'll see you guys soon! :D

 **~~61wisampa**


	9. Just Like Back Then

**IX: Just Like Back Then**

You once again found yourself in the park, walking around to pass the time. School had just finished an hour ago and you were bored. Your homework for the rest of the week had been dealt with, Kuroko and Uiharu-san were both in Judgment, and Saten-san had to work on some group project so you were alone again for the mean time.

You really didn't think you'd be this bored after everything that had happened. You lost your memories and for a while, you thought you'd spend the first few weeks of school trying to catch up on your lessons relearning everything about every aspect of your life. As it turned out, neither happened because for some reason, ninety percent of your lessons were things you already knew and apparently, giving you too much details about yourself was highly discouraged so you were only given the basics.

You guessed it could've been worse. At least all your free time had given you the chance to re-familiarize the city. Whatever identity crisis you had been having has toned down as well, with all the support your friends—and some not—helping you when you needed it. And apart from those run-ins with people you had known before you forgot, your life had been pretty uneventful.

You pulled out your phone from your pocket, deciding to bug the only person you knew would be as bored as you were right now. Typing out a quick message that said _'I'm bored. Entertain me.'_ , you sent it, your lips twitching up a little. You continued to walk as you waited for a reply, humming a little as you went.

You immediately flipped your phone open when you received a message.

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _What am I, a clown? Entertain yourself._

You let out a laugh. You approached the bench you had spotted in front of the vending machine and sat down as you replied.

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _If I say you're a very pretty clown will you reconsider?_

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _No._

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _Oh c'mon. I know you're not busy. Hang out with me._

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _Not all of us have enormous amounts of free time, Misaka-san. Some of us have responsibilities and work to do._

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _Pfff as if. I know for a fact that you 'ask' your clique members to do your homework. Plus, you don't have extracurricular activities. You're as free as a leaf._

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _For your information I DO MY OWN HOMEWORK. And I may not be active in school but I have other activities outside of it. Once Heaven Canceller deems you fit enough to return to research work, you'll understand._

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _Research work?_

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _I'll explain more in detail some other time. I really am busy, Misaka-san._

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _With what exactly?_

 _ **Shokuhou Misaki:**_ _That's something for me to know._

 _ **Misaka Mikoto:**_ _What the hell do you mean by that?_

You drummed your fingers on the surface of the bench, waiting for her to reply but she never did. You sighed. Maybe she really was busy. You guessed that it was already nice of her to reply to your message in the first place if she really had been doing something.

Your friendship with Shokuhou was a bit funny. Your relationship with her could be defined by teasings, competitiveness and witty arguments. You two didn't even hang out much because apparently, two Level 5s being seen together was such a big deal and Shokuhou didn't like getting herself into the spotlight. You texted frequently though, and it was always fun. You hoped you two could go out for tea again some time soon.

You frowned though when you realized she was hiding something from you again. Secrets had been a constant with all your friends now. A reason for that was probably your doctor warning them not to tell you, but a part of you felt like they were hiding something else that wasn't about how you lost your memories. What was worse was that it felt like they were all in on it, like they were sheltering you from something.

You ran your hand through the back of your hair and stood up. It was no use worrying about it right now, and although you were a little displeased, you believed that they had good reasons to do it. Or maybe you were hoping they did.

You stepped towards the vending machine and pulled several coins out. You had learned from the first time you came here to always keep change in your pocket, just in case. You had also began carrying arcade tokens with you after your encounter with Sogiita. As he had said, you'd never know when you would need it.

You had just grabbed the can of juice you purchased when a familiar voice shouted, "Yo!"

You turned your head to find that same black spiky haired boy you had met in front of this very same vending machine. He was sending you a crooked grin while the hand that carried his school bag was raised in a gesture of greeting.

There was something in your chest that started forming at the sight. It tugged at your heart in a way that you couldn't describe, and all you could do in response was to smile back and say, "Hey."

He approached you, stopping a few meters away from the machine. "Been a while. You brought change this time?"

You nodded, showing him the can you had just gotten. "Thanks for last time, by the way."

He shrugged. "Don't mention it. No one else should suffer losing money because of this old thing." He said as he kicked the corner of the machine lightly.

You hummed, but then stopped when his words finally registered to you. "Wait... _'no one else'_?" you sent him a playful smirk, and he immediately avoided your eyes, looking away innocently. You crossed your arms as you turned to him, saying in amusement, "Oh I gotta hear this."

"Hear what?"

"The story of how you apparently lost money to this thing," you jerked your head towards the machine as you spoke, "and how much it was exactly."

He kept his head turned away from you.

You started to grin. "Hey, c'mon. How much was it? I won't laugh at you, promise."

He sent you a glare, "Oh no, I'm not falling for that. You said that the last t—" he stopped himself, his expression suddenly turned sad and regretful as he looked away again.

You froze at the same time he did. You didn't need to ask to know what he had been about to say— _the last time_. "What?" you asked, your voice a mere whisper. " _The last time,_ " you repeated, the volume of your voice rising a little, "That's what you were going to say, right?"

He didn't answer, and after several moments, when you realized he wasn't going to say more, you persisted.

"You knew me, right?" you asked. The tug at your chest became more insistent, as if it was telling you that you were doing something right when you wanted to know who he had been in your life. "I've guessed before, when we first met here and you saved me from getting my money eaten." You thought he had flinched twice as you spoke, but you couldn't figure out why. "It wasn't hard to figure out, but... why didn't you say anything? I know Heaven Canceller probably told you not to tell me anything important, but why didn't you even tell me we knew each other?"

For some reason, your chest was constricting almost painfully as you spoke. It hurt. As if something terrible had happened and you wanted to cry. You didn't understand these feelings, but you followed them either way, abiding by what your unexplained _feelings_ were telling you to do.

He was silent for another moment before he murmured, "I'm not important."

You felt rage burn in your veins. "No. You don't get to be the judge of that." You growled lowly, clenching your fists as you desperately tried to keep your emotions in check. You were mad at him, so much, but the most prominent of all was that you were upset with him. It felt like your heart was breaking and you didn't even know why. "I _deserve_ to know. You can't just walk into my life so casually and not tell me! If you were so unimportant then why did you even bother meeting me again?"

"Because I can't stay away." He responded, and when you looked at his face, you could see the sadness that he was trying to hide and it made your heart hurt all the more. "I can't be important to you, but you are to me."

There were about a hundred things you wanted to say to that but you held them back. You weren't being fair, you realized, because as hard as it was to lose your memories, you knew it was just as hard for the people who cared about you. You looked down at your feet in shame, noticing that the can you had been holding was now a little deformed. You took a deep breath, calming yourself, before saying in a soft voice. "Can't you at least tell me your name?"

You were expecting it, but it didn't hurt any less when he gave you a sad smile and said, "I'm sorry."

You two were silent for a long moment, just standing there in front of the vending machine lost in your own thoughts. Absentmindedly, you held the can between the palms of your hands and used your ability to bring it back to its original shape. Using your ability for tenuous activities was still impossible for you but you could do little things like this.

The silence was broken when you heard him sigh. You turned your head towards him to see him looking at the other direction. "I have to go." He said. You felt a little disappointed at that. "I know this hasn't been the best second meeting, but I'll still be coming by here every now and then. It's your choice if you want me to see you again."

You frowned a little at his words. "Don't say it like I won't want to."

He let out a mocking smirk. "Well, you shouldn't."

You wanted to argue but you couldn't find the energy to. Who was this guy who obviously cared a lot about you but didn't think he deserved you to care back? It was confusing and your chest only felt heavier as you thought about it.

"Bye then." He suddenly said, walking away from you.

"Wait." You called out before he could take another step. He stopped and looked expectantly at you. For a moment, your mind went blank. You didn't know what to do or what to say. But then you noticed the can of juice that you still held and threw it at him. He was surprised at your sudden action but he caught it nonetheless. "It's thanks for the last time. Now we're even."

He looked at you for a moment, then at the can in his hand before her lips twitched up into a smile. "Thanks."

You felt heat rushing up to your cheeks and tried to shrug indifferently, looking away. "Don't mention it." You tried to distract yourself by fumbling for more change to put into the vending machine. You couldn't figure out why you were suddenly so nervous. The quick shifts of emotions you had left you a little disoriented.

"You know, I heard that there's a legendary granny-like oblique kick at a 45 degree angle that can make any malfunctioning machine work." He told you with an easy grin. You blinked. "Maybe you should try it."

With that, he turned around and went on his way, leaving you staring at his retreating back. Your brows scrunched up as you thought about what he said. "Is he insinuating I should steal?" you murmured to yourself, looking back at the vending machine with critical eyes. After his suggestion, you were almost sure that people _had_ been kicking this thing, if the dents on the side were any indication. You thought about it for a moment, wondering if committing a crime was worth to satisfy your curiosity.

With your stare still intensely locked onto the machine, you took a stance, hopping lightly on your feet before twisting around and doing a skirt-level kick.

"Chaser!"

A wonderful clunking sound came from the machine, followed by the terrifying sound of security robots announcing an act of vandalism.

* * *

 _"_ _You're not kicking it today?"_

 _Your hand paused for a second when he spoke, and then continued to reach for the can that the vending machine had popped out. You were aware that you had uncharacteristically bought from the vending machine instead of kicking it for free drinks like usual, and of course, he'd notice that as well._

 _You opened the can of juice and took a few huge gulps before letting out a content sigh. You shrugged in reply to his earlier inquiry. "Didn't feel like wasting energy for it."_

 _He chuckled a little. "You should conserve energy more often then."_

 _"_ _Shut up, you idiot." You said, but both of you knew there wasn't any real hostility to it. Smiling a little, you turned to him. "You're taking remedial classes again?"_

 _He let out a defeated sigh. "Well, this idiot is just unfortunate enough to skip so many classes that remedial classes are required even though I passed the subject." He moved beside you and slipped a couple of coins into the machine before pushing a button. His own can of juice dropped down and he bent down to pick it up. "Thanks for that by the way. At least attendance is the only thing I have to make up for."_

 _"_ _Don't mention it."_

 _"_ _Why don't I treat you to something?" He said, taking a sip from his juice. "It's the least I could do."_

 _You elbowed him playfully. "I just said don't mention it. You don't need to do anything for me."_

 _"_ _Then why don't you do something for me?" He grinned at you, and your heart skipped a beat. "Will you go out with me for lunch? My treat. Just don't go picking something too expensive. I'm not a rich ojou-sama like you."_

 _You felt your cheeks heat up but you tried to keep calm and replied. "Sure." You fought the goofy smile that was threatening to escape your lips. "I know just the place."_

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

yes. uhm. hi. no excuses. just sorry i haven't updated in... uh 3 months? yeap. man this fanfic is not that great to make you guys wait that long for a chapter XD

One thing that I really don't like about Touma's character is his hero complex. like, he's surrounded by really powerful friends and yet he still thinks he has to save all of them? I mean, it has gotten better in the few last novels i read (which is NT12 i think XD) but yeah being overprotective is annoying because it means you don't think that person can take care of themself which in turn means you're insulting them :D sorry i'm channeling my anger from another fandom...

BUT ANYWAY. I didn't realize Mikoto and Misaki are like... totally flirting on text... the BLONDE AND BRUNETTE LESBIAN TROPE IS UNSTOPPABLE. haha no but don't worry this is Kamikoto through and through ;D

Also Kamikoto has been having study dates before this fic. And also actual kinda dates.

So my update schedule is still inexistent but i do have a good news for this fic. Until last chapter I still have no idea where the story is gonna go and was just writing ideas that may be cool. but now I've finished the outline and there's a tentative 20 chapters in total! We're not even halfway there! :D

anyhow. If you find grammar errors and stuff please tell me :DD

 **Next Chapter: You're Still You to Me**

Ten bucks no one will get this right XD

I hope you guys are still reading this! XD

 **~~61wisampa**


	10. You're Still You to Me

**X. You're Still You to Me**

You released your grip on the heavy metal block, allowing it to drop onto the ground with a loud bang. It jarred your mind even more than using your ability strenuously, leaving you almost sickeningly dizzy. You put your palm against your head and leaned on your knees, willing the dizziness away as you panted. Your therapy had been becoming heavier each session and today, your therapist had insisted you try lifting 100 kg of metal to see if you were able to regain some part of your original power.

By lifting, you of course meant using magnetism to do it. And apparently, back before the _incident_ , you were able to lift a hell lot more than this.

You closed your eyes as another wave of nausea assaulted you. You really shouldn't think so much after one of your sessions.

Dr. Inami, a very sweet and kind Ability Therapist—(the best in her field, and though she was very kind to you, she offered no patience to men, especially those who she claimed was _'just like my last husband'_ )—approached your hunched form and touched a cold bottle of water to your forehead. You sighed in relief at soothing feeling, closing your eyes for a moment before taking the bottle so you could hold it on your own.

"How are you feeling, Misaka-san?" Dr. Inami asked, and you could hear a little trace of amusement and concern in her voice. This had been the first question she had asked you since your sessions started. She'd make you do something with your ability and then ask what you were feeling. You knew she was gauging whether you'll be able to go back to your full strength or not, or if you could, how long it might take. Apparently, whatever happened to you had messed up not only your memories but other parts of your brain too.

No one told you _how_ it messed you up though, and apart from knowing that it affected your abilities, you knew nothing.

"Dizzy." You answered Dr. Inami after a while. Straightening up, you told her everything that may be caused by the therapy. " _Really_ dizzy. My vision got blurry for a moment, and my head is starting to throb like _hell_." You removed the bottle from your forehead and twisted the cap, drinking from it. You relished the cool water going down your throat and immediately felt a little better. "I think the headache is more from fatigue though. And for some reason, I feel a little sore. It feels like I lifted the damn thing myself."

Dr. Inami was dutifully scribbling notes on her clipboard as she replied, "Must've really worn you out if you're speaking with such crude language." You felt your cheeks go a little warm. "What happened to the prim and proper ojou-sama?"

You frowned a little, giving her a little glare. "Memory loss, remember?"

She snorted. "Could've fooled me. You were so polite on our first session, I could hardly believe you're a crazy Level 5."

"Hey! Being a Level 5 doesn't equate to being crazy!"

"Oh honey, you beautiful, naive, newborn baby."

You forgot to mention that even though she was kind and sweet, she _loved_ messing with you from time to time.

Dr. Inami ignored whatever unpleasant expression you had on your face and continued as if you hadn't talked. "How about while you were lifting the metal, did you have any problems calculating? I saw it waver when you first lifted it."

You huffed but shook your head in reply. "No. That was the easy part. I'm sure all my calculations were right, but when I tried to use my ability, somehow I couldn't put as much power as I wanted to. It's like my strength was never enough. I couldn't lift it as easily as I wanted to because I keep adding more power once I realize I exerted too little."

The doctor gave a thoughtful hum, glancing at you as she tapped the pen she was holding on her chin. You emptied the contents of the bottle as you waited for her response, and after another moment, she said, "It looks like our initial theory was correct."

Your eyes snapped back to her. "What initial theory?"

"Heaven Canceller had, of course, given me a very detailed description of what happened to you—the physical and mental damage you've sustained, I mean." She explained, putting the clipboard wedged under her armpit so she could cross her arms. "We initially tried to deduce how they could affect you so I can properly set your therapy sessions, and we thought that you'd have problems using your full strength. When it comes to calculative abilities, you are still very much a Level 5, but when it comes to power output, I'm afraid you're only at par with Level 3s or a weak Level 4 at best. The damage in your brain seemed to have affected your Personal Reality, in a way. It didn't change it, but it's weaker now. Your AIM field isn't as strong as it used to. But what's even more perplexing is that you didn't lose your strength from the get go. It steadily decreased since you woke up until a few days ago. We're not even sure if this decrease has really stopped or if we can reverse it. We think it's more psychological on your part."

You listened quietly as she spoke, your brows scrunching up as you tried to discern her words' implications. "What does that mean for me then?" you asked.

"It means..." she sighed, rubbing her temples once before continuing, "It means we don't know how you'll get your old strength back. I'm still advising you to come to our sessions and exercise your ability regularly. Just like muscles, maybe you just need to work it a bit and you'll get back stronger than ever. It's not a certainty though because while levels aren't measured with how strong your AIM field is, you're the first case that we know that dropped levels because of it. Most espers who drop levels get brain damage and end up being unable to perform complicated calculations while still retaining their large AIM. With you, however, is the opposite, and we're not sure how to approach it."

You stood there, contemplating about what she had just said. You don't really remember the power you had before all of this, but knowing that you might not be able to get it back put a pit in your stomach. It seemed like a very important part of the previous you, and though you were sure that your friends won't think of you any less, you knew it was this power that had helped you protect them.

But then again, it was this that had probably caused you to lose your memory too.

You sighed, brushing your bangs with your fingers distractedly. You didn't really know how to respond, so you nodded to her and said a soft, "Okay."

* * *

"Are you alright, Misaka-san?" you looked up from the drink that you had been absentmindedly stirring with your straw when Saten-san spoke. "You seem a little down."

You two were at Joseph's Cafe, waiting for Kuroko and Uiharu-san to come and join you for dinner after they finished their Judgment work. It would be another half an hour before they finish but you and Saten-san decided to wait anyway. Besides, it was raining outside and, umbrellas aside, you didn't really want to get your socks wet.

You thought for a moment, recalling your session with Dr. Inami that afternoon. You had been trying to get your mind off it but to no avail. You hadn't told anyone about it because 1) you didn't really have the time to and, 2) you just didn't want anyone else to know. But Saten-san is alone with you right now and from what the three of them had told you so far, you tend to vent out to Saten-san with things like these—problems where you didn't need an overreacting Kuroko or a hero-worshipping Uiharu-san.

You pursed your lips for a moment before saying, "It's nothing." because even though you knew Saten-san was the best bet to tell, you were independent and stubborn and would rather not burden your friends with things that seemed too trivial to fuss over.

In response, she gave you a hard stare and set both of her arms on the table, leaning towards you. In a stern voice, she said, "Misaka-san."

You met her gaze and couldn't look away. "Y-yes?"

Her eyes narrowed a little before she continued. "I know you don't remember it so I'm telling you this again. We're your friends, and we'll always want to help you. You can't just keep things from us." You averted your gaze and this seemed to cause her to sigh. "I know it would take time for you to trust us again, but we're all trying. We care about you and—"

You hastily shook your head when you realized where she was heading, "That's not it, I swear." You stopped her before she could get to some other conclusion about not trusting them enough. You did, oddly enough, but it was still a little scary to admit it to them. "It's not that I don't trust you, Saten-san, I just..." you struggled to find the words, and you trailed of when you couldn't.

Saten-san seemed to sense your struggled and prompted, "You just what, Misaka-san?"

You took a deep breath and blurted out, "I don't trust myself." You told her, gripping the glass in front of you. "Everyday, I keep trying to get my memories back, trying to remember who I was, and everyday, I seem to get farther and farther from that."

"Misaka-san—"

You put up a hand to stop her. "Please, just let me finish first." She closed her mouth and nodded, and you took hat as cue to continue. "First, I was trying so hard to fit this image of Misaka Mikoto everyone has told me, and I ended up making a fool of myself. And when I try to be myself, everything else just goes and reminds me that Misaka Mikoto was better than me and I could never measure up to her. No one will ever trust me like that again because I'm not _me._ Hell, you guys don't even trust me enough to tell me the truth."

Your words seemed to have stung Saten-san a little, but you felt like you've been bottling this up for too long and now you couldn't stop.

"And then earlier this afternoon, when I went to therapy, my therapist told me I may never get my power back again." You leaned your forehead against your palm, clenching your other hand into a fist. "I'm no longer a Level 5, and I may never recover from that... I may never be _me_ again.

"And I don't know... because of that, I feel like I can't really tell any of you guys. You're all Misaka Mikoto's friends, but who am I? Just a hollow shell that she left when she lost her memories." You admitted as you closed your eyes, feeling a slight heaviness in your chest. "I'll never be able to match up to her."

Your eyes snapped open when you felt a warm hand cover your clenched fist. Your glance darted to it before settling on Saten-san. Her eyes were sad, and there was a guilty look on her face, and for the life of you, you couldn't fathom why. She opened her mouth a moment later but she didn't speak. You watched as she tried to think of the words to say, all the while, her hand began to tremble a bit and her eyes watered lightly. The tears never escaped though even as she took a deep breath and finally said.

"I'm sorry, Misaka-san, if we ever made you feel that way," she lifted her other hand and enclosed yours between hers. You wanted to say something to tell her that _no, you didn't do anything wrong, it was me_ but her expression made you stop. You squeezed her hands, hoping that it would at least reassure her as she spoke. "But know that I'm telling the truth when I say that we don't care that you lost your memories, or that you're not a Level 5 anymore. To us, you're still just that girl who is a little tomboyish and adores Gekota to death, but is also brave and loyal and would help anyone in trouble with or without power." She gave you the biggest smile she could muster, reminding you of that moment when she and Uiharu-san had first learned of your memory loss. "It's not your level, Misaka-san, or whether you're acting correctly or that you can't beat your old high score in the arcade. It's... it's just _you_ , Misaka-san. I see you, talk to you, and I know it's you. I don't need any other proof than what I feel when I'm with you."

You felt your neck and cheeks burn as she finished. You were mildly embarrassed at how sincere and just... heart-warming her words had been. You couldn't help but notice one thing she had said though... "H-how did you know a-about the a-arcade?"

Her smile slipped into that mischievous grin you become so familiar with. "Well, I kind of saw you spending all your tokens on a single game one time, and when I tried it, I saw that most of the names in the highest scores were _'Miko2'_ except for the number 1 place. And since I know for a fact that you had the highest score on most games there, it didn't take me long to realize it was you."

You buried your face into the palm of your free hand and groaned. "Was it really that obvious?"

She giggled a little, but her voice was once again serious when she spoke. "But I mean it, Misaka-san." You looked up at her again and found her gazing at you softly. "Your level doesn't define who you are, and it surely doesn't make you any less amazing to me. Like a really good friend once told me, _'Levels don't matter. It's your desire to help others that makes a difference.'_ I live by those words now, and I want you to believe them too."

You felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from you chest. A smile made its way to your lips and you told her, "Thank you, Saten-san."

She grinned back at you and with one last squeeze, released your hand as she said, "That's what friends do, Misaka-san."

You felt your smile widen. You took a sip from your neglected drink, thinking about what your friend had just said. After a moment, you asked, "So who's the friend who told you that?"

Her lips turned up lightly as she answered, "You."

* * *

 _"_ _Misaka-san?" Saten-san's voice was worried and trembling when you answered her call. "What are you doing? I thought you said it's dangerous to go to that place."_

 _You clenched your phone a little tighter as you felt the familiar hum of security cameras around you. You should've known Uiharu-san would find you. You knew you had acted suspiciously when you asked Saten-san to stay with Uiharu-san while Kuroko was informing Anti-Skill and the rest of Judgment about what was happening. You cursed inwardly for forgetting to cover your tracks in your haste._

 _You took a breath and replied as calmly as you could. "Don't worry, Saten-san. I'll be back as soon as I can." You told her as you continued your way to your destination._

 _"_ _But you're heading somewhere dangerous! I still don't know exactly what's going on—Shirai-san hasn't told any of us—but mobilizing both Judgment and Anti-Skill? This sounds as serious as that incident with Febri! You're going to need our help!"_

 _"_ _Saten-san, it's—" you paused, trying to find the right words to say. You were touched by her concern and desire to support you, but you knew that this was one battle they couldn't join. "I don't want to lie to you..."_

 _"_ _Then please, tell us what's happening so we can help you!" she pleaded._

 _"_ _I can't."_

 _"_ _Don't you trust us?"_

 _"_ _It's not that—"_

 _"_ _Let us help you, please!"_

 _"_ _I—"_

 _"_ _Misaka-san—"_

 _"_ I can't. _"_ _You repeated with as much weight as you could, hoping she'd understand. "Please, believe me when I say that this isn't because I don't trust you because I do. But this isn't like the time with Febri. We're not just about to face an army of powersuits or trying to stop several missiles that are heading for Academy City. I don't even think we'll be facing science at all. That's how unsure I am about this thing, and that just makes it all the more dangerous. So please..." your voice softened into a whisper as you begged, "Please just trust me on this and keep yourselves safe. I promise, I'll tell you everything after."_

 _You waited tensely for her reply, hoping that she—all of your friends—were not angry enough to ignore your warnings and follow you. After a long silence from her end, she said, "You need to promise me one thing, Misaka-san."_

 _Her words made you pause. "What is it?"_

 _"_ _...come back to us safe and sound."_

 _You couldn't say anything back. You didn't want to lie nor did you want to break any promises. So instead you said, "I'll see you guys when this is over."_

 _Silently, as you snapped your phone shut and continued to race to the building, you knew Saten-san didn't miss the fact that you did not promise her anything._

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

What is with all this drama? Why did I write so much drama here?! uuuuuggggghh also I was informed that Saten-san and Frenda are on the cover of a Railgun spin-off so... SHIPPING IT XD even though i still kinda ship Saten and Accelerator. ugh the curse of multishipping but not being comfortable with OT3s

got this chapter out after leaving a chapter 80% finished for 6 months XDDDD at least I updated a weeeee bit faster this time hahahahaha sorry

expect more chapters like this in the future!

 **Next Chapter: Don't Think that I Care**

let's all hope this story will be finished before 2020! :DDDD also I think this next one has been a long time coming... and hopefully more predictable


	11. Don't Think that I Care

**XI. Don't Think that I Care**

You opened your phone to check for the time as you stood in front of the movie theatre. You still had plenty of time before the movie would start, and Fremea, Kreutune and Last Order were supposed to arrive any minute now.

It had been weeks since you promised the little blonde girl a movie, and between recovering your memories and trying to go back into your life, you hadn't had a chance to fulfill the promise you had made—that and the fact that you didn't know you had Fremea's number until a few days ago when you had absentmindedly scrolled through your contacts.

You had immediately taken out your PDA and checked the movies that were showing that weekend before texting the girl and asking her if she'd want to go. The little girl had excitedly said yes and told you that she'd tell Last Order and Kreutune so they could decide which movie to watch.

You fiddled with your thumbs nervously. This would be the first time you would meet both Last Order and Kreutune. Fremea didn't know about your memory loss and you were sure the other two didn't either. But with the was Fremea had acted around you, you had easily concluded that you were close to the three kids. Kakine even confirmed that you used to bring them out frequently and that the three kids had come to look forward to these little outings.

This knowledge put some pressure on you. You couldn't let them know about your memory loss because it would surely make them sad—if they understood what it meant, that was—and you really didn't want to disappoint them because the mere thought of it made _you_ feel disappointed with yourself.

Point was, you wanted to make these kids happy, even though you couldn't remember who they were. It was like a hidden protective big sister instinct woke up at the mere thought of them.

You saw them before they did you, and when Fremea and two other kids waved happily at you, you couldn't help but smile and wave back.

You faltered when you saw a lanky white haired guy with a cane follow the three kids, having a disinterested scowl on his face. He didn't look friendly but he didn't seem hostile either. You considered that maybe he was one of the two kids' babysitter. That would explain why he was frowning.

"Onee-chan!" Fremea bounded up to you and hugged you around the waist. You giggled a little when the other two followed her example and did the same. "I thought you'd forgotten about your promise! Essentially, what took you so long?"

"'Don't be ungrateful!' says Misaka as she continues to hug her Onee-chan, 'She was hurt and she needed to recover! She had no time for little kids like you.'"

"I'm not a kid! Essentially, you're the little kid!"

"'I'm physically older than you!' says Misaka as she boasts the fact, 'So that means _you're_ the little kid!' says Misaka as she concludes proudly."

"Alright, alright," you interrupted them before Fremea could retort to the hazel haired girl. They released you as you told them, "I'm sorry for not calling sooner. I was a little busy with school."

Fremea shook her head gleefully. "It's no problem! Essentially because you still kept your promise."

"'That's right!' says Misaka as she nods in agreement." You turned to the other girl and froze when you got a good look at her appearance.

Her hair was short and hazel in color, and her eyes were near the same shade. She had a cowlick sticking up on the top of her head and she was smiling at you with a very familiar face.

It was you, only a few years younger. Your Mama had showed you childhood pictures, and you were certain that the little girl in front of you looked exactly like you. It was as if you were looking at a life-sized picture of yourself, smiling up to you.

 _'...SISTERS.'_

Your eyelids immediately shut at the sudden onslaught of images. Although it lasted for merely a short moment, it had left you reeling and disoriented.

But most of all, the image of your emotionless face wearing military goggles made your stomach churn.

 _'...what was... that?'_

"Is Onee-san... okay?" the little girl with an almost bored face asked, snapping you out of your reverie. You met her gaze and saw that even though her face wasn't expressive, her eyes easily leaked concern as she looked at you with a tilted head.

You shook your head, gathering your wits and sending her a smile, "I'm fine. Don't worry about it." You crouched down to be at eye-level with them, asking, "So have you decided which movie you want to see?"

Fremea's hand shot out first. "Yes! We're watching the little people inside your brains!"

Your mini look-alike immediately interjected. "'We are not!' says Misaka as she huffs angrily at you. 'We're watching the yellow villain workers!'"

You watched as the two kids argued but found yourself staring at your look-alike. There was something in your gut that knew she wasn't a relative (and even if she were, you were pretty sure your Mama doesn't have _Nurse Joy_ genes), and you were sure she wasn't your little sister either. If she was, your Mama would've told you, right? There was no reason to hide it. And as far as you knew from everyone you had known, you were an only child. She couldn't be your sibling.

So then... who was she?

"Ahh, shut up, you brats!" the white haired boy that had come with them surprised you when he suddenly put a hand on top of your look-alike, ruffling her hair as he said, "If you can't decide yet, then just go inside and get some snacks first! Stop wasting my time!"

With a shout of defiance, your look-alike pushed his hand away and escaped his range, sticking her tongue out to him. "'Accelerator isn't the boss of me!' says Misaka as she sticks her tongue out to the cranky boy!"

"Haa? What did you say, Last Order?!"

"'We do what we want!' says Misaka as she announces it proudly!"

"Alright, enough," you interjected, because even though you were hella confused as to what had just transpired, you had enough sense to break up an argument before it got worse. It almost felt like instinct to you, to do this kind of thing. "Why don't you three do what Accelerator—" you caught his name earlier, "—said and grab some snacks for the movie?" You told the three kids as you took out your wallet. Handing Kreutune—if your look-alike was Last Order, then the last one must be her—a one thousand yen bill. "Here. You're in charge of the money, okay? Don't let these two buy anything too crazy."

Fremea and Last Order had varying expressions of shock while Kreutune obediently nodded. "...roger..." she mumbled before running of to the snack bar with the other two chasing after.

You let out a sigh. It hadn't even been ten minutes since meeting up with them and already you were tired. There were too many questions in your head and the one who could probably answer them was—

"Nice work getting rid of them, Railgun."

— _him_.

You rubbed your temples as you turned back to him. He was looking at you with a bored expression and you couldn't stop your gaze from hardening as you said in slight exasperation, "Don't tell me... you're a Level 5 too, aren't you?"

He shrugged, and there was a subtle twitch on the corner of his lips that led you to believe that he was amused. You frowned at the thought. "Alright then, I won't tell you."

You groaned, covering your face with your palm. And you thought the Level 5 Visits were over. "Accelerator, right? And you're Number 1, I presume?"

He hummed, "Well, at least you're still as smart as you used to be. How's amnesia working out for you? I heard you dropped to Level 3 because of that."

You couldn't help but feel a little mocked by his words, and your anger flared up. "Look, if you know what's been going on with me then what the hell do you want? Another _'keep yourself out of trouble while your still powerless'_ speech? Because if you are, then you should just leave. I've had enough of that from the others, and at least they went about it a little nicer than you did."

He snorted. "What, you think I'm stupid enough to repeat what second-rate and fourth-rate told you? Please. If anything, you're the one who wants something from me."

"Oh? And that is?"

"You want answers, right?" You stiffened at his words. He glanced at you with a raised eyebrow. "You want to know why Last Order looks like you when you know you're an only child. Or if anything else, at least who those kids were to you. Am I wrong?"

You glared at him, and though he was completely right, you still couldn't help but feel irritated, prompting you to quip back at him, "Are you gonna lie like everyone else?"

He let out a chuckle at your words. "You're damn a hypocrite, you know? You kept so many secrets to protect the people you love, yet now you can't stand them keeping secrets from you to keep you safe."

"Yeah, I'm getting the feeling that we weren't friends pre-memory loss, so keep your opinions to yourself, if you don't mind." You said, looking dryly at him before turning so you could head to where the kids had gone. You were a little too annoyed to even care about what he had to say, even if it was probably your only chance to get more information about the hidden part of your life. Plus, your pride just wouldn't let you admit to what he had claimed. He must really be someone you hadn't liked before.

But before you could take more than three steps, he stated, " _Sisters._ "

The familiar term rang in your head, and your head snapped back towards him. "...what did you say?"

Whatever mocking tone or expression he had earlier was gone, replaced by one of blank seriousness. He was no longer frowning nor was he sneering. It made you a little uncomfortable.

"You remember the word, don't you?" Accelerator said, standing carelessly as he shifted his cane. "That frog-faced doctor told me to be more careful regarding that part of your memory, but I think it's better that I tell you now before... an unexpected meeting."

There was that familiar irk whenever people talked vaguely with you, but he was the first to tell you something since leaving the hospital that you found that you weren't as mad as you thought. Instead, desperation clawed at your chest, eager for any information he could give you.

"What do you mean by that?" you asked, taking a step closer to her, "What memory? How much did Heaven Canceller tell you to hide from me? And just who is _Last Order_? Is she related to that word you just said? _Sisters_?!"

"Calm down," he told you with a stern voice, holding your eye contact and not showing an inch of fear. In the back of your mind, you knew for a fact that even at your full strength, you probably didn't stand a chance against him and with your condition right now, there was no way you could win. Still, the secrets that had been surrounding you since day one had been shortening your patience bit by bit, and his rudeness didn't really help.

But when you heard the distant shouts of the three little girls from the snack bar your anger halted. The fists you didn't notice you had clenched shook and you took a deep breath to calm yourself. You may not care what this rude guy thought of you, but you definitely didn't want to scare those three kids. You closed your eyes and counted to ten, willing your rage to a more manageable level, and when you deemed yourself calm enough, you looked back at him with a glare.

In a low voice, you said, "Answer my questions."

You noticed his eyes flicker behind you for a moment before he replied, "We don't really have much time so I can't go on full details, not to mention that frog-faced doctor would probably kill me if he finds out about this. But the gist of it is this: your DNA sample was used for a fucked up experiment to achieve Level 6. Last Order and 9961 other girls were the by product of it after you and the hero stopped it. So if you meet one of _them,_ try not to freak out and remember that you risked your life to save them."

You only felt more confused than ever. "Them? Who's _them_?"

Accelerator was about to answer you when he suddenly stopped. His eyes diverted to the place over your shoulder before he quickly looked away with a click of his tongue. "Tsk. Looks like I've already said too much."

"What?" you said in disbelief. You looked behind you in search of whatever he had seen that made him stop, but you didn't see anything noticeable. For the first time since you woke up, you cursed the fact that your EM Waves Spatial Sensing was rendered almost useless when your AIM field dropped. From your range of 30 meters radially, it decreased to a pathetic 2 meters. You gritted your teeth in frustration and turned back to him. "Why can't you tell me?"

" _He_ doesn't want us to," he said, shrugging, "I don't even know how he got the right to tell us what to do, but everyone else just agreed. I think it's stupid though. Keeping you in the dark doesn't mean you'll be kept out of the action."

You opened your mouth but you didn't know what to say. Everything was just too confusing to you and nothing was making sense. "I don't understand what you're saying." You mumbled defeatedly, fisting a hand through your hair. "Who's this _he_? Is this the same person that everyone refused to tell me? Is this _he_ that ' _Kamijou_ '?"

There was an odd look on Accelerator's face before he dryly responded, "I can't say who either of those two are. But know that this is the fucked up way of _him_ showing that he wants to protect you."

You couldn't help but snort at his words. "So leaving me clueless with no idea who I'm supposed to trust is protecting me?"

He shrugged. "I did say it's fucked up." He turned his head towards the inside of the movie theatre and you followed his gaze, landing on the three little girls who were harassing the person manning the counter at the snack bar. He nodded towards them. "I think you should go there before shit starts. Kami knows the hell of trouble those three could get into."

"Yeah," you agreed but didn't move, sighing as you felt your shoulders slump down. When you looked at him again, he was already limping away with his cane. "Hey, Accelerator," you called to him before he could get far. He stopped and you continued, "Thank you. You were the first person to be completely honest with me since I woke up. I just want to tell you that I appreciate that."

He didn't look back when you spoke, and you stood there waiting for him to continue walking. But after a moment, he craned his head a little towards you, not enough to see his face but enough for you to know that he was acknowledging you.

"You owe me nothing, third rate. When you get your memory back, I'm sure we'll come back to our mutual hate for each other... but for the record, I do appreciate you not letting us die." He started trudging away again but shouted back, "And don't you fucking dare tell anyone else that I said that!"

Your lips twitched up in a smile at his words. He seemed harsh but you got the feeling that he just didn't want anyone to think that he cared. He may be a little annoying but you don't think you could hate him, whatever it was that had happened between you two.

Shaking your head, you jogged towards the snack bar to save the poor girl at the cash register from the three overly active children.

* * *

 _"_ _What the fuck are you doing here?"_

 _You found yourself frowning at the first words that came out of his mouth. You didn't expect a warm welcome but couldn't he be a little less crude about seeing you?_

 _"_ _Look" you began through gritted teeth, "I don't wanna talk to you any longer than I have to so I'll get to the point. I need your help."_

 _His brow rose. "_ You _? Want_ my _help? Are you shitting me?"_

 _Your frown deepened. "No, I'm serious. I can't save him without you."_

 _"_ _Ah, so you want me to get involved in that shitstorm your boyfriend got himself into? Like hell. He needs to grow a brain and figure out which crap he shouldn't get into."_

 _"_ _You know what's going out there so you must know that he's doing it to save Academy City! He's trying to save your ass and everyone in here!"_

 _"_ _If he did, then he wouldn't have started this shit with Science and Magic. He's just acting on that stupid hero complex of his. If you ask me, he should've stayed on one side instead of meddling with both. That's what he gets for fucking up."_

 _Your hand shot out in rage, grabbing his collar, "Is that all you can say?! He_ fucked _up?!" Your grip tightened as you glared at him, "He saved you once too, didn't he? Do you really not care about this city? Are you really that heartless, you monster?!"_

 _"_ _You really hate me, right?" He met your burning gaze with a deadpanned one. "If that's what you really think of me, then why did you even ask for my help?"_

 _"_ _Because," your jaw clenched."As much as I hate you for killing all my Sisters, I know you must hate me just as much for being the reason why you had to go through the experiment in the first place." Your hard grip remained for a moment before loosening. The intensity of your glare lessened as you continued. "If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have all that blood on your hands."_

 _Your hands slipped down from his shirt and fell to your sides as you avoided his gaze._

 _He snorted. "My hands weren't as clean as you think."_

 _You shook your head. "Even so, I... I'm sorry... for the experiment and what I said. Last Order told me about all the times you protected her. I know you're not heartless, nor are you a monster."_

 _"_ _Is that why you asked for my help?"_

 _"_ _No," you told him, finally meeting his eyes again, "I just know I need your strength to save him. But it does mean I'll be grateful for your help... if you decide to, that is."_

 _He let out an annoyed sigh and scratched his head. "Fine. What do I have to do?"_

 _You blinked in surprise. "Really?"_

 _"_ _Yeah. Like you said, I do owe the hero. Seems like a good time to pay him back. Now tell me before I change my mind."_

 _You couldn't help but break out into a smile. You took out a folded piece of paper from your pocket and held it out to him. He looked at it skeptically before taking it._

 _"_ _I'll see you then." You told him, before racing to your next destination._

* * *

Your eyes snapped open, seeing what seemed to be the ending of the movie you were supposed to be watching with the three little girls.

There was a dull throb in your temples, and your heart was palpitating as you regained your bearings. Your eyes closed, trying to slow your breathing as you recalled the short dream you had when you fell asleep inside the theatre.

You pressed your palm against your forehead as you remembered what you had seen, feeling a little dizzy from the ordeal. The word _'Sisters'_ once again resounded in your head as you remembered the conversation you seemed to have had with Accelerator. "What... what was that?"

* * *

 **Author's Notes:**

i have not updated since May and wow if you're reading this you are sooooo amazing. i dunno. i don't really have much to say.

So this chapter is Accelerator! hopefully, pretty obvious from the title? Also he's the type to never sugarcoat anything so his honesty can be a catalyst for something XD Also I adore those 3 little kids. They need to be best friends forever.

I'm gonna be honest, i don't know when I'll be updating next. I'll aim for at least before this year ends, if my life becomes less hectic, but i will :)

 **Next Chapter: Restraint Isn't My Strong Suit**

Is it obvious who it's gonna be? XD probably. I don't know. Expect a long chapter! hehehe

 **~61wisampa**


End file.
